Kids can be tough without fighting, why is that many men associate tough with fighting? It is ignorant to think the only tough people around are ones who fight.

It's part of being tough. It's not all of it, but again the world isn't gonna roll over and let you have what you want. We are talking about bullying and fighting as if they are one. Yes kids shouldn't be pricks. That is mostly to do with their upbringing. If you balance your child's education you will get a balanced child, but we don't have ONLY balanced children out there. Some because they may just be "bad seeds" genetically predisposed to jackassery. Then you have the kids desperate for attention and seeking all the wrong kinds. These are typically your classic bully archetype.

Mommy and Daddy are too busy or are just shite parents to tend to a child's demands of attention and love. The shite parents are more often than not the primary cause of bullys.

A real man must know how to defend himself orally, mentally and physically. To teach only orally and mentally toughness breeds a sour crop of children, both male and female. Words hurt, but so do fists....usually quite equally if done right. You need to know that pain from both sides....everyone does and that can't happen without getting into a few fights in your life.

You are ignorant if you think fists hurt more then words. I would rather be beaten and put in a hospital then insulted. I can deal with physical wounds, I can deal with physical pain. I would much rather suffer broken ribs then be told, like I have so many times, that I worthless, a poor excuse for a woman, or a whore.

Well then sister. I bet you had shite parents. You weren't instilled with a strong sense of self worth. NOBODY can make you feel bad but you. If you believe it then it's true. If you know you're not worthless or a whore then the names and words shouldn't mean a thing. Words have only as much power as we give them.

Show your strength by not letting it bother you. I could call you a church steeple....it doesn't make you a church steeple. Unless of course you believe you're one.

HAHAHAHA No one can make you feel bad but you? Why dont you go read my past posts in this forum, because people can VERY MUCH make you feel like a shitty person, and I am not going to sit here and talk to someone who doesnt know ANYTHING about what he is talking about. You go ahead and tell me that it wouldnt bother you, and I call you a liar plain and simple. I know I am a strong person, but there are some words you just dont say to someone, and there are some things you just dont bring up.

PERIOD. You go ahead and come to me when you have been so beat down and demoralized that you feel like nothing but a trash can. THEN and only then can you debate this with me, because YOU havent been there, you havent been to the bottom and fought desperately to find the light.

*ahem* Excuse me ma'am your soapbox isn't a good foundation for that pedestal your on. Look I could sit here and self help you (which is an oxymoron if you think about it), but truth be told I have a life away from the computer. My final advice. Buy a suit of armor cuz softies break easily.

You go ahead and make judgements about me, but I can bet my house and everything in it, you would crack under what I went through. Period. I know this, I know it takes a STRONG person to still be living after even half of what I went through, and anyone who knows me will tell you the same thing. You go ahead and go live under your little rock and keep believing "words only hurt if you let them", I know different as do many other people not only on this site but in the world.

I hope you never know someone who has to go through that pain.

I don't think you understand the concept of self help either. Keep going through... every comment you leave shows why you have to use violence to compensate for your lack of intelligence.

You're such an idiot. Do you know anything about psychology or domestic abuse? Wome in abusive relationships are isolated from their friends and families... they are told over and over and over how worthless they are, until eventually they start to believe it. It's called conditioning and it's PSYCHOLOGY. It doesn't make them weak or pathetic or mean they have bad parents.

Oh my goodness, it's a while since we have had someone quite THIS ignorant on Bloop. I've kind of missed taking your type down though. ;) You're the perfect example of someone who doesn't have the brains to deal with a problem without resorting to fisty cuffs. Being in 'a few fights in your life' doesn't make a person. It doesn't even make a person stronger. It's pathetic and just goes to show you don't have the intelligence or self confidence to ignore the situation, walk away, or resolve it in a different manner.

And again, SELF DEFENCE is a completely different matter. NO-ONE is suggesting you shouldn't physically protect yourself should it be necessary. Getting "in a few fights" is not self defence. I KNOW how to defend myself with words, and physically, should I need to. I am a strong person, WITHOUT having ever been in a fight in my life. Why is it that you have so little belief in yourself that you can't consider yourself a man without fighting?

Hang on a minute... Tommy, is that you?

WELL, Mister buttercup...

First off.. Hahahahaha at the troll comment. Do you even know what a troll is? You haven't been here very long, have you? Still, thanks for tha laugh.
Secondly, how does not advocate violence equate to bring passive aggressive? Do you even know what that means? I have never once suggested I don't believe in teaching kids to be tough, or disciplining them properly (and I'm not even against smacking!). Choosing to resolve an issue without violence isn't the definition of being passive aggressive. Only idiots need to resort to violence because they're too stupid to resolve it any other way.

Kids will be kids and and learning to deal with name calling etc does make them stronger. I do not think that is a good reason to stand by and ignore a child being subjected to a long campaign of abuse and hatred though. And kids can be tough without being taught to hit each other. Hitting someone is an easy way out. A child who is REALLY strong is able to walk away.

Apologies for the typos above. Blackberry predictive text is to blame!

That is completely ignorant. A woman can defend herself as much as a man can defend her. I live with my husband, but after having been through too much abuse, I know how to hit and where to hit to get that man off me and give me enough time to grab my gun and blow his brains out.

To say that you have to fight to be a real man is ignorant and pathetic, at least my husband who doesnt fight, and CRIES about things, knows that if he has to protect his family he could do it, and do it proudly. Fighting doesnt make you a real man, it makes you someone with a bully complex.

A real man can fight if he needs to defend a life, but knows that most situations dont require a fight. It takes a stronger person to walk away

Do you realise that some of the kids who've experienced the worst bullying are CLINICALLY DEPRESSED? That's not being a 'pansy'. When someone is depressed they often cannot see any way out other than suicide.

The vast majority of kids who are bullied do not attempt suicide, but you and I have NO idea what this girl went through which brought her to this point. She likely felt completely alone and could see no reason to live. That doesn't make her a 'pansy'. And it's cruel attitudes like yours amongst parents that creates bullies to start with. Honestly, a CHILD KILLED HERSELF. She didn't need to grow a back bone... I'd say you need to grow a soul. Act like a human being for goodness sake!

Red Fraggle, you are fucking brilliant.

You are very brilliant!

Thank you. :)

I agree. It's awful but I think weak people are a waste of space.

But what is the definition of a 'weak' person?

Well, my personal definition is someone who lets things get to them and defeat them. The kind of people that whine about stuff and then do NOTHING to improve the situation. I know many people like that and I can't be bothered with them.

I believe that anything can be overcome with willpower, a support system of friends (granted not everyone has this), balls and determination.

Also 'weak' people are ones that get taken advantage of again and again. This happens to everyone at least a few times in our lives, in jobs and relationships, and we learn from our mistakes and either rectify the situation or move on. But some people seem so determined to not learn from their mistakes, and they sink deeper and deeper into a world of depression and since they have had so many chances to get out of it it's kind of their own fault. People have to help themselves.

I have very little tolerance for people like that. It's like they have no will to survive.

This is all subjective of course.

You're right, 'weakness' is VERY subjective.

I also have a low tolerance for people who whine about everything and expect others to sort out all of their problems. There's a lot of them on Bloop, and I often come across them through work too.

But that is not what we're discussing here. We have no information to assume that this girl was like that. She didn't whine and seek attention for her problems, instead she chose to deal with it on her own, by ending her life. She must have been in extremel pain to reach that point, and I do not think suicide is necessarily a sign of weakness. Often, people who kill themselves are SO low and depressed that they genuinely believe that not only are they worthless, but that others will be better off without them as a burden on their lives. They often believe they are doing the best for everyone by killing themselves (as illogical as that of course is... but depressive thinking usually is illogical).

And as you said yourself, not everyone does have a good support system to help them overcome problems.

Is the Columbine shooting still considered to be this generation? That was blamed on bullying, wasn't it? From what I remember, when school shootings have happened in the past, the perpetrators end up being mentally unstable victims of bullying/ridicule that were misunderstood, etc etc. Maybe the shift is from taking it out on the bully/everyone around them to taking it out on oneself/ending it all. Rather than this girl seeking revenge, she just offed herself. Both instances show shitty coping mechanisms. That poor girl. Her poor family. I feel like the faculty member definitely should have done something about it. Someone that works at the school should NOT just stand by and watch a child get picked on.

No it was not blamed on bullying that is a MYTH. My husband was best friends with one of the kids who was killed. The kids who did the shooting were mentally unstable, Eric was the ringleader and Sociopath, and Dylan was depressed and very much Eric's follower.