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All you need is Love
by ✌-mel-☮

previous entry: well there was an inteview.. aaaand it's gone.

next entry: Reddd Robin. YUMM

at an impass

06/09/2014




Time: 12:55am

State of Being: in a good mood. kind of tired, but i'm off tomorrow so i'm staying up late because i can

Song lyric in my head: this girl is on fiiiree!! (i'm not a fan of this song. sorry)
current desire:a made decision

where am I?: in the living room on the couch

what's that noise?: nothing now. debating on putting on a movie. but that's too much work. the dvd player may or may not be connected. and there's no remote for either so would have to manually do everything. which isn't a big deal, because it's about three feet from my feet.. but then there's the whole deciding which movie. which takes longer than you realize. because you have to weigh the pros and cons of each one, and we have A LOT of movies..




So I worked this weekend. I normally work weekends, and they are the two days out of the week I get the least sleep. And I work the longest hours. Which isn't a big deal, but this weekend was an unusual one. A) Orange is the New Black came out. I didn't get to bed until late Saturday night. And I was already up late friday because I'm used to being up late. My sleep cycle is set for the most part. I finished it last night. Russ is awesome and watched the second half with me. He was out Saturday night and I put it on and got to episode 8. Last night, he put it on with out asking which was awesome of him. lol. ... and then B) my cashier, Rebecca was on vacation so it was just me and my pharmacist Janet running the whole pharmacy. On top of that, it was way busier than usual. It wasn't like we were backed up, but it was constant movement all day. Saturday morning was crazy busy, then after lunch at 2, Donald came in to help out. Then it slowed down. So Janet decided it was a good time for us to go in the back and watch training videos on our new MTM assignments. The video training was an hour long and let me tell you the amount of excitement I did not have. But it got me out of the pharmbox for an hour, so the complaining can only go so far. Then I came back and Donald watched it. Anywho, that was Saturday. Sunday, it was just Janet and me all day. Which was also pretty busy.

Today I worked at 5. Our cashier Rebecca decided to no-call no show. And I was so excited to have a cashier back! I really hate working the register. I'm not a negative person by nature so the word, 'hate,' is mostly used in a hyperbole. Other times in sarcasm. Most of the time I try and tell myself that hating the register is an exaggeration. But then I come to reality and realize: nope. I just hate it. It's part of my job. and I have to do it. And it sucks. But whatever, life goes on and there are worse things in life.

So Janet was pretty upset. I could tell that Robin and DJ were too, because they'd been running ragged all day. She apparently had her friend call the pharmacy and tell Janet her flight was cancelled and she couldn't come in. Which was weird, because Janet said she never answered her own phone. And the whole story seemed so sheisty. So hopefully Rebecca comes in tomorrow. And this may sound selfish, because it is, I don't want the call for me to come in on my day off. Nobody loves that call.

So on my way home today from work, my mom texts me. A few weeks ago, Russ and I got vacation for the first week of July. I really wanted to find a way to go to IA, because I miss my family up there. Plus 4th of July in the small IA town my mom grew up in amazing. The tiny town goes crazy and has a carnival and amazing fireworks. They put up little jars in stores all year so the townspeople could pitch in for the 4th of July fireworks and they've always been AMAZING! I miss it so much and I've always wanted to bring Russ there. I haven't been in over a decade. Plus my grandad is still up there, and I haven't seen him in so long. I really wanted him to meet Russ, and all the rest of my mom's family he hadn't met at the wedding.

But IA was looking less and less logical. Money was the biggest issue. So okay, next idea: MOM'S! My mom lives up near ATL. I miss her and my step-dad so much. I haven't seen them since the wedding. (5/18/13) And not to mention, they have a pool and a back yard for the dog to run. I haven't been up to the house since '12 to see my college roommate get married, then '10 for my other college roommate. lol! I guess it's every two years exactly. I get I should get up there. oh more about that in a sec.

So our next plan was to go to GA, I FB message my mom asking if it's cool if we stay a week if get a chance. She pretty much said of course! And nothing else was discussed. And I was excited to go!

Last week, Russ' boss reluctantly told him that he cannot have his vacation, because someone is going to go on medical leave. So GA was out. I've been putting off telling my mom, because i didn't want to burst her excitement, and i can safely say July is still a safe distance away. But she texted me tonight asking if we were still coming up. I had to burst that bubble. But she wants me to come up alone now. Which is understandable. But Russ and I have only one car so me driving up there and him getting to work would be an issue. But now she wants me to fly up and i can borrow one of her cars up there. My step dad works for delta so he gets free buddy passes for stand by tickets.

I used to fly back and forth from GA to FL ALL the time when i lived up there during college. ALL the time. It was a lot of fun.

So now I have to decide if I want to go up. So let's ramble off the pros and cons for both. Last week, i came to the realization that I had to stay home for my vacation when i was looking forward to getting away. I now couldn't go anywhere so I decided to make the best out of it. Come up with things I could do. I can get this apartment SUPER CLEAN! I don't get excited about cleaning. I really don't. Cleaning just.. sucks. It's repetitive and boring. But I decided during my vacation, for a couple days, i'm going to put on loud music, get kind of tipsy and stoned with a lot of caffeine and just clean. Everything. And throw away a lot of stuff. I just want to get this apartment pretty, because it's getting a little bad. Russ and I aren't clean people. I mean we're not living in filth. don't get me wrong. Unless you're looking through the eyes of an OCD neatfreak. They'd have a heart attack in our place. lol. We're very cluttery and leave dirty dishes in the sink and the chair in the living room has just been a rather large pile of clothes for years. And I'm a hoarder. I mean I don't have what looks like a cave of wonders, but I collect a lot of nick nacks. and books. and DVDs. and memories from high school and college. The closet in our bedroom is nothing but boxes. Stuff I carried around with me from apartment to apartment. Now it's serious time to go through it all and throw a lot out.

AND in my vacation, I can also get together with my friends. I don't see them enough. Maybe once a month if we're lucky. I go months without seeing them sometimes. Our schedules just don't mesh. and I miss them. I'm glad there's facebook where we can all hang out on the internet some how. Remember we all exist and still share our lives. But I miss them. And on my vacation, I will have PLENTY of time to infiltrate their lives again and spread my diabolical plan of love and insanity. True story.


So now i have this decision of going up to Atlanta. I would be Russ-less which is really weird. I don't know. It's hard to explain. I feel off.. when I'm not with him for very long. There's been times where we've been away from each other for about a week. But it feels weird. And I really miss him. It's almost a separation anxiety. Not to the point where it's detrimental to the fun and the memories, it's just that they aren't with him. I know it's healthy to get away from each other. At least that's what people say. But there's nothing unealthy about us that we need some kind of supplement. I don't know. It's just weird without him, and i really miss him. period. But if go up there, I will get to see my mom and step-dad. Have a whole pool AND backyard, I can go out side at night and just chill! maybe bring my lap top outside so I can work on my damned novel. lol. I WILL FINISH IT! I can go see my friends from college I haven't seen in YEARS! I really miss them too! I can relax and get away from everything. Florida just drives me crazy and I need to get away for a while. It wouldn't be as hot and gross up there. And it'll be quiet except the frogs in the pond at night. I'll be in my old bedroom. The water pressure in my bathroom at my mom's is AMAZING! I miss the showers.

So I have a predicament. I have to make a decision. To stay here during my vacation and get a lot of housework done and see my local friends I haven't seen in months. Or go up to GA to visit my mom and step dad, see all my college friends, and just relax? I am at an impass.

At least July is still a safe distance away so i have a little bit to decide.
but i still have to decide.

peace!
-mel-

1:50am
ps. yes. purpose Princess Bride quote.

previous entry: well there was an inteview.. aaaand it's gone.

next entry: Reddd Robin. YUMM

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How long is your vacation for? If it's for like a week, go see your parents for like four days, spend the rest at home cleaning and see your friends. I would DEFINITELY go see your parents though, it's been a long time since you've seen them and I am sure they miss you. I jump at any chance to see my mom (she only lives 35 minutes from me so I see her much more frequently than you see your parents). But yes, is definitely say go see your parents, maybe visit some friends from college and then go back home and use up the rest of your vacation!

It does suck being away from your husband but it's not forever. Heck, my husband and I only see each other on weekend because his job is so far away. We make it work though, and when we see each other we appreciate it that much more.

Anyway.. I hope it's not too difficult to make your decision. Good luck.

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