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-Neurotically Yours's Diary
by -Neurotically Yours

previous entry: Brand New Day

next entry: A Crisis of Faith: Posing Questions That Have No Answers?

Broken Glass Breakups and Life Goes On

01/01/2012

Well, coming back into it, I'm realizing that even my determination to write stuff on here has suffered a small slip through the cracks.  And it's not even for lack of wanting to write an update, I've just been extraordinarily busy recently, as much as I hate that.  So now that I have a small space to breathe a bit, here's what's been happening.

Firstly, comes the news that's changed my life the most personally.  Which sounds more dramatic than it is until you find out that it isn't the breakup mentioned in the title.  By personally significant, I mean I had a bit of a mishap with my truck recently.  Christmas Eve actually, while I was on my way to work.  See, all year in Grand Rapids it has snowed a grand total of three times.  Lots of snow each time, but it's just not been frequent.  But it has rained a lot.  So when the first snow rolled around there was a good layer of ice underneath it and no salt on the roads, thanks once again to it being the first snow of the year.  This resulted in me, moving slow as hell, ending up careening down a hill in what would seem to be a desperate bid to push someone's bumper straight up their ass with my own.  Unfortunately, this person was driving a vehicle with a spare tire mounted on the back.  And those mounts aren't exactly forgiving.  The truck now has a "V" shaped indent in the engine and will never again move under its own power.  So rest in peace, Rutherford.  You got me from point A to point B for far longer than anyone has any right to expect of a vehicle.  Being 22 years.

Now I'm making due with my parents old van for now, though I've got to come up with some money pretty soon if I want to keep it around and have transportation.  And I have all kinds of other payments I can't meet right now as well.  So we'll see how that goes.

Now, on the second hand, I've been falling down the steps of learning a new job.  It's basically the same job that I had before, but full time and with a few more responsibilities.  And at a new store.  One that never actually closes, so I have to deal with customers getting in my way and mucking up the work flow, even on third shift.  Also, I've needed to learn to be a cashier, which is all kinds of annoying.  I will rarely use this ever again and it makes me wonder why they can't just hold one of the actual cashiers an extra half hour every night.  Then I would have no reason to actually know cashiering.  Regardless, I do that too now.

But what I'm actually worried about is the rest of my job.  Seems everyone else who worked third shift at my new store applied for the job as well, fully expecting to get it.  And the fact that I got it instead is going to leave them rather sour at the new guy.  So I can't wait to see how that plays out.  I find out tonight though.  Yay.

The last really significant thing has to do with a pair of really close friends of mine, Foy and Jackie.  They were probably two of my first three real friends when I moved up here some years back.  Both of them have been very good friends to me and been together besides.  Foy is a pretty nice, charismatic guy and Jackie's a great girl, really cute, and the two of them just fit together pretty much perfectly.  Until just recently.  They both had a lot going on and Jackie just moved out to Kalamazoo for a job with a game developer; I don't remember the name.  I don't have any details from one or the other, but I guess one thing lead to another and the went from planning their futures together to breaking up.  They don't seem to out of sorts with each other; in fact they handle each other better that I've seen most anyone deal with a big break like that.

And oddly, I have felt this rather strongly myself.  Like I said, they are two of my best friends out here, and seeing them spring apart after spending so much time with them and them being the only real couple I know other than Lindsay and myself...I wish it hadn't happened for them.  Certainly for their sakes, but for some reason I can't explain (and at the risk of sounding like a girl) I feel like I've lost something in it.  I'm still on good terms with the both of them, and I continue to hang out with Foy regularly, since he doesn't live far away.  But them not being together just feels...off.  I'm not sure what it is, and I can't explain it as well as I'd like to, so I guess I'll just leave it to your imagination to come up with it.

But that's been all the major changes in my life lately.  Other small changes that don't pop off the top of my head.  Mostly for the worse, but some for the better.  I guess that's the way it always is.

previous entry: Brand New Day

next entry: A Crisis of Faith: Posing Questions That Have No Answers?

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I know what you mean about your friends break up. It's like something so concrete. So perfect. So unchangeable. Became something you never thought it'd be. And that makes everything else seem like it's not concrete anymore. It makes you question things. Or maybe that's just me. haha.

Anyway. Why have I not seen you in forever. This is a dilemma. Let's make something happen. And soon.

[kel-syStar|0 likes] [|reply]

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