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internet confessional 3.0
by girlsetsfire

previous entry: i am a nightmare and you are a miracle. [photo]

next entry: hey there, pretty girl. [photos]

i'm sinking like a stone in the sea.


i'm super emotional right now. i'm 9 months pregnant, and we just found out it's likely baby has a cleft palate. we won't know for sure, or the severity, until bean is born, but it looks likely on ultrasound. we went for a growth scan today - the first scan since the routine anatomy sonogram in january - and happened to find out this other shite news. on the plus side, baby is otherwise healthy, growing well, and a possible cleft palate is better than a whole host of other things that could be wrong. on the con side, it's likely our little one will need corrective surgery, and it's possible that breast feeding will be difficult (or impossible) the first part of baby's life. there's nothing i could have done to prevent this, and there's nothing we could have done to fix it had we found out sooner. it's just a lot to process, and it's so late in the game that we were pretty much blindsided.
otherwise, it's looking like bean is going to be a chubbers, with a current estimated weight of 8lb 9oz. um, you could stop plumping up in there any time now, little one. today's ob didn't sweep, giving us some time to process the cleft palate news, and making sure that our lactation consultant was aware, talking to a pediatrician, etc. she's on call on thursday tho, and i'll be going in that morning for a sweep, and to schedule an induction for monday if baby isn't here on its own by then. i'm currently trying to figure out my breast pump, as it's likely i'm going to have to use it sooner rather than later.
in other news, we finally planted some things today, so i'll have chives and basil and dill for all of my delicious cooking needs, and beans and cucumbers and tomatoes later in the summer. in terms of a garden, it's not much, but it makes me happy to grow a few things, and to see living things when i look out into the backyard.

previous entry: i am a nightmare and you are a miracle. [photo]

next entry: hey there, pretty girl. [photos]

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I am so sorry about the news! As upsetting as that is, at least it's not something super serious that can't be fixed and it's not life threatening. So that's good! I am sure it's a lot to process. *hugs* It will all work out.

[*Pixie*Star|0 likes] [|reply]

yes, it will work out. it's just... a shock. on one hand, i'm glad it was found, but knowing that there's nothing we can do about it, and won't know how extensive it is until bean is born leaves me feeling very helpless. part of me is still hoping they're wrong, but i am trying to be realistic. there's a fine line between learning more and freaking myself out with too much information that might not even apply. i'm hoping that we get some more information when i see my ob tomorrow.

[girlsetsfire|0 likes] [|reply]

That's a lot to take in. I'm sorry for that news. I'm kind of hoping Bean is going to join William in the Big Baby Club, though! I had a month left and he was measuring about the same as yours is, and he was 10.4 at birth. Big babies are amazing, though! 😊 Just breathe, mama. And cry if you need to. Things will work out.


[Love, Rebekah|0 likes] [|reply]

Thinking of you, your hubs, & baby, sweetie.

[♥ jesStar|0 likes] [|reply]

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