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Beyond Belief
by A RedSox Fan

previous entry: 714 A true diary entry

next entry: 337. Thoughts of Lithium music on my moms birthday *poem

715 double header and updates on last entry 06 06 15


715 double header and updates on last entry 06 06 15

I have no idea how long this will be or what I will end up writing about however, I want to thank everyone who read-noted my last entry. I appreciate it. If you want to skip the baseball stuff and get down to the other stuff, just look for the line of stars.

I had 4 bleacher tickets for Monday’s game. It was raining so the game was postponed till Wednesday as part of a day-night double header. Unfortunately, this caused a scheduling conflict. The people who were going with my Monday had to work and go to school on Wednesday so they couldn’t go. I Posted on FB that I had tickets, did anyone want to go with me. A college friend who I have gone to a few games with the last couple of years said he would hate to see a RedSox ticket go to waist so he would go. I re-posted on FB Tuesday night saying I had 2 more tickets. No one responded. So I figured we would sell the tickets for my lunch money. If I got $20 for them, that would be fine. I met up with Matthew and we walked around a bit trying to see what we could do. The big problem was, people had the same idea I did. There was lots of tickets people were trying to rid of. A nice lady told us that she had two box seats. Matt said ok, and handed the lady the other tickets. The lady said, no, I’m giving them to you. He said, well, you can have these since we done have any use for them. She thanked us and said that she would try to find a family of 4 who could use them. Kindness feeds kindness. I hope she was able to give those tickets to a nice family.

I should describe and tell you a bit about Matt. We met in our freshman year of college. We hung out with two other guys that year and we were all pretty good friends. After that year, he never came back to college. School wasn’t his thing. We lost track of him since we didn’t have any of his information. He went on to be a professional wrestler in the local rings and also worked for his father when he had a gig for him, doing construction. Matt is 6-4, about 240 LBS with a long beard. Hmm he looks Sorta like the undertaker. He doesn’t wrestle much anymore because he’s seen as “old” in the profession and so he still works for his father when he has something for him but … so he doesn’t have much money. Knowing all this, I didn’t ask for money for the ticket. I told him he could buy me a drink or something.

We went into the stadium and to our seats. We had tickets behind the right side on deck circle, about 20 rows up. These were amazing tickets. Matt looked at the value of the tickets and let out a bellowing laugh. They were $92 tickets.

Game: the Red Sox are in a slump in every aspect of their game and for about 2 weeks. I think they only won 2 games in the previous 10 games. (Don’t quote me on that)

However, the Red Sox had called up a 22 year old pitcher the week before and was dominating. He was only supposed to pitch that one game and be sent down but after a performance where he gave up 3 hits and no runs over 7 innings, he would stay. The manager, with 6 days’ rest, called upon Edwardo Rodriguez, E-Rod, to pitch and pitch he did. He had the poise of a vet, the command of a vet and had ice-water running through his vanes but he was only 22 years old. Once again, he pitched 7 innings, only giving up one run, which was a home run, 3 hits and was spectacular. He kept me on the edge of my seats with the strike outs. I think he had 8 in getting the win for the Red Sox.

We had talked about staying for the second game. Matt said he had saw tickets for $12 before the game. After much arguing with myself if this was real or not, I only been to one other double header and that was 22 years ago against the Texas Rangers. We were here already. Matt and I had nothing better to do. I could just throw it on my credit card and we would just have to let people know. I called my dad to ask if he could pick me up about 10PM instead of 4PM? So we could stay for the second game. He said sure, whatever you want. I thanked him and confirmed time and location. (Well, not really time, just said after game) Matt called his GF to let her know and it was off to the ticket agency to get discounted tickets. (Believe it or not, they actually do give those. I guess it’s better to take a little hit than a big hit for them. I paid $65 (with fees) for 2 $45 tickets. We were down the right field line, 20 rows up.

He said as for food, I had brought a few bags of travel size check mix so I snacked on those during the first game with the idea of having a meal for the second game.

We walked past Boston Beerworks because the lines were out the door. Went to Game On, not only was it crowded but the music was so loud you couldn’t hear yourself think, never mind hear someone talking. So he said what about this Blues place? House of Blues or something? I was like sure? If we can get in? There was no wait, it was busy but not loud

We split two orders of chicken wings. One buffalo and the other was a lemon ginger. The buffalo was really good. The ginger was a dry rub, which I’m not crazy about but I don’t know, I couldn’t taste the ginger at all. I could taste a lot of salt though.

I picked up this bill too. I think it was $23. He left the tip.

Then it was off to game two.
Unfortunately, Rodriguez can’t pitch every game. Rick Porcello, who we traded for and then gave him a contract fit for an ace, came in with a record of 5 wins and 5 losses with a 4 + ERA. He didn’t do anything to add to that as the Red Sox lost by the final of 5-1.

Our offence couldn’t hit. Our pitching couldn’t get batters out and our defense couldn’t make the plays.

It was a nice day-night at the ball park though. I was away from my family, my work, and all that jazz.

Although, it really does make a difference who you go with. Although Matt knows baseball like I do, he’s not much for conversations. There was a lot of awkward silent as far as I was concerned. When I tried to make conversation, he would give me 1 to 2 word responses.


In my last entry, I spoke about how I woke up feeling down. I’m happy to report, although that day was a blah day, I didn’t wake with those negative feelings. It was strange though. It wasn’t like I was having a bad day or anything. I never woke up like that before.

Karen, I sent a text message this morning just saying “morning”. I didn’t hear from her. I didn’t think so since it’s the weekend. She’s either working or at his grandparent’s, taking care of them. She goes over their place every weekend to clean up and help out. She does it out of the goodness of her heart.

I still don’t have a fulltime job however, I am keeping myself busy with helping my coworker put together a letter for requesting donations. She showed me her version and it just gave me a head ache. It was so unorganized, things that just didn’t make sense. She had sent me a business plan a few months ago so I brought that up and that was just as confusing. I couldn’t figure out how many programs she had. Somewhere she wrote 4 but then there was 5 under that and some programs had a descriptions were others had what I would say are just list of activities. It was just all so confusing. She even had that she serves children in the elementary and middle school but somewhere else she has age 6 to 18. Her letter is also 4 pages long. No company wants to pick up a letter and read it if it’s 4 pages long. It should be a page to a page and a half.

I talked to her and told her about some of this stuff and she basically told me to do what I think needs to be done. I told her that I will write up what I can and leave asterisk with what I need where I need.

The other thing is volunteering for my sister’s football team, looking for grants. I haven’t done much about that…yet.

My parents are talking a bit now but my Dad’s on edge with everything he says-does. I feel bad.
Tuesday is my mom’s birthday and she informed my dad that she’s going to Foxwoods Casino (in CT) from Monday night through Wednesday and from there, she’ll go to my brother’s to baby sit. “So I’ll be home Friday.”
Although it’s not much of a concern for me, it’s not my problem, however, when they talk about each other when I’m in the car with them or at a restaurant, it’s not like I can just walk away. Besides, it’s normally just a comment here-there, so I never know when they’ll say something.

As far as the money my Mom owes me, I never lent her the money, she basically, spent my money and then told me about it. At some point, (month end?) I will ask my mom about the money and she’ll probably just tell me to get the money from Dad. My father will freak out and I don’t know what then.

Work…same. I don’t want to work there anymore but if I don’t, then what will I do? I will be just sitting in my house for that much more time. It’s frustrating. I do hope this grant writing thing works and if not, like I told my twin, if not, I’ll try something else.

Speaking of my twin, I asked if he wants to go to a Everclear concert. He said he’ll pass this time. I asked about a minor league game for a group of us. He said the only Sunday he has in the next 2 months is the 28th of June. … I’m not sure anyone will be able to do that because no one responded to my mass email I sent out. His wife does fun things with her friends a lot and my twin doesn’t do anything. I feel bad for him and I feel bad for me.

Karen: the same… when I talk to her I’m on the 9th cloud and when I don’t hear from her, I feel down and even just her “good morning” or “ “*hug*” text responses, aren’t doing much for me anymore. I want to know how she’s doing. I want to know what she’s doing. If she’s feeling down, I want to know that and I want to know why. If she’s excited about something, I want to know that too. I like when she tells me about work or when she has me on the phone while she’s food shopping. I love her voice, her giggles, the way she pronounces my name and when she says bye, she says “latah” (making fun of my Boston accent) I (silly enough) miss her dog. I love Mogi and I know that dog loves me too. I don’t remember the last time she called me. I know it was basically because I was sending her a few “I miss you” type text messages. Before that, it was like two weeks before that. So pretty much, in like the last 5? Weeks, I’ve talked to her 2 times. I miss her… A LOT.

Why she can’t call me on the way to-from work, to-from-at the store or … I don’t know.
I love her for all she is and all she can be.

Although, I came up with keys of relationships over the years and it comes down to, Honesty, trust, good communication and shared hobbies-being able to do what the other likes even when you don’t like to… and we are honest with each other, trust each other and shared -do what each other enjoys. I’m just not so sure about this communication thing. I try. Lord knows I try.

Win-lose or rain out, my Red Sox are always there to comfort me.
They won today, winning 3 of the last 4 games now. Hopefully this is the start to something good. I believe in my Red Sox.

I’m not sure where my life is going.
I’m not sure what I’m going to do.
Unfortunately, I can’t do everything I want to do.
I can’t just go to a concert myself. I can’t just get in a car and drive to Indiana and kidnap the love of my life and bring her to safety. I can’t just get any job. I can’t … do a lot of things.

However, what I can do is just keep believing, keep hoping.

“Without Hope, I got nothing” Kip Kinkel, 1998.

previous entry: 714 A true diary entry

next entry: 337. Thoughts of Lithium music on my moms birthday *poem

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aww I hope Karen realizes that you love her and maybe you two need to visit each other. Long distance relationships are tough. I couldn't do them.

[valenciaStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Keep the hope that's what makes you special things will work out eventually it took me years but things finally worked out for me and will work out for you to

[Girl_interupted|0 likes] [|reply]

Hope is an amazing thing, hope keeps me going everyday xx

[theUpsandDownsofLife|0 likes] [|reply]


[Greta GarbageStar|0 likes] [|reply]

what?It's been so interesting getting to know you, a twin? I mean, sure we've all have one of those.

I would totally would have gone to the everclear concert with you!

Have you ever just asked her what is going on? because truth be told, she might be done in a way or moved on - not taking the time to reply to me would be an indication to me. She's pretty much not my favorite person right now.

[septemberocioStar|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: 714 A true diary entry

next entry: 337. Thoughts of Lithium music on my moms birthday *poem

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