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Discussion Forums » General Discussion
What makes a good mother?
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16 Jul 2009, 20:17
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
Thank god you're not a mother then. I can't see how you'll possibly cope.
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16 Jul 2009, 20:20
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
Weddings aren't quiet places! Churches aren't quiet places. Churches are usually full of kids. As they should be. I can't see God saying "I don't want you bringing your child when you come to worship me, because he'll make a noise"! ;D God loves the babies. ;D

I also disagree that a baby crying at a church/wedding/funeral irritates a lot of people. There's been babies at virtually every wedding and church service I've ever been to, and it's never irritated me, nor have I ever seen it irritate anyone else. I think you're just a little overly sensitive. Please never have kids if you only want ones which will keep quiet.
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17 Jul 2009, 16:17
LN
Post Count: 28
god does not love babies--- that's why they cry.
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14 Jul 2009, 18:56
Mami 2 ♥ 1
Post Count: 361
i am a mother and i think a good mother is someone that puts her child first even before herself. i think a good mother means she sacrifices her wants and needs so her child/children can have the things they will need or even want. i think a good mother is someone who always has their childs best intrest at heart and does what she can to provide a safe, happy, and loving enviornment. I think a good mother is someone who is nurturing and listens to her children.

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14 Jul 2009, 20:18
Acid Fairy
Post Count: 1849
Nicely put. What she said ^^ ;)
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14 Jul 2009, 19:04
AddalynsMommy
Post Count: 2
I am a mother and I would NEVER put my child in the bath without checking the temperature first. I don't know of anyone who would put their kid in and then see if it was too hot. That is bad parenting (or stupidity) in my opinion.
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14 Jul 2009, 21:00
Minda Hey Hey™
Post Count: 330
I like how she wants to sue the landlord for that. I'm not a mother but um, isn't it common sense to check the water BEFORE you put your child in? Even I know THAT!
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14 Jul 2009, 21:03
Madeline Rain
Post Count: 151
She's suing her landlord because apparently the water was hotter than what's allowed on the building code. Her attorney will obviously have to prove that. In the meantime, I will have to agree that it's common sense to check the water temperature before sticking your 17 month old in the tub, but what do I know? I'm not a juror. That's why I need people's input.
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14 Jul 2009, 21:06
Minda Hey Hey™
Post Count: 330
Well even if the water was hotter than what's allowed--she would have known about this awhile back ago then? Sorry haha, I'm not trying to sound snotty BUT if this lady knew this before and still didn't bother checking the temp then she has no right to point the finger. Unless she had warned the landlord and it wasn't fixed before.
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15 Jul 2009, 00:34
.Blue Bella.
Post Count: 743
I dunno about over there... but when they 'taught us to bath baby' in the hospital, the first thing they said was to test the water temperature.
Maybe the water was hotter... that is what the cold tap is for.

A good mother takes the responsiblity of their own children as her own and does not blame other people coz she was too stupid to take 2 seconds to test the water temp.
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15 Jul 2009, 00:12
Lauren.
Post Count: 885
If you were feeding your child, would you cut a piece of steaming chicken and pop it in the child's mouth? Probably not. That goes the same as testing the temperature of the bath water.

As for the general question of what makes a good mother, a good mother is one who puts her child above and beyond herself and anyone/anything else in her life. Someone whose main goal in life is to protect their children, model them, discipline them properly, teach them all that you know, and love them whole-heartedly and unconditionally.
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15 Jul 2009, 05:24
Lovin'MyLittles
Post Count: 322
Lauren, VERY well said and a very good point. I would never throw my child into the bath without checking it first. Now that my child is a bit older, I might toss her into a cold shower occasionally ;) Just kidding, just kidding. I hope the disposition goes well, Madeline!
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15 Jul 2009, 01:01
Madeline Rain
Post Count: 151
Alright. I'm ready and I've prepared my questions. If everything goes according to plan, the deposition will focus on the fact that she didn't check the water temperature before putting her child in the tub. After all, if this case goes to trial, a jury might consider the same things you guys did while giving your opinion. Mindi makes an excellent point, however, and I will ask my client (the landlord) if the mother ever warned him that the water was too hot. The more I think about it, the more I realize this woman must be scared to answer questions regarding the quality of her care. Otherwise she wouldn't have repeated "I'm a good mother" like a mantra. I will post more after the deposition tomorrow!
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15 Jul 2009, 11:53
~*Pagan*~
Post Count: 378
ask this fool if she has ever heard of a COLD WATER TAP :S
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16 Jul 2009, 12:00
Mojo Jojo
Post Count: 278
The psychological effects of having your child injured whilst in your care are awful.
Case in point: I used to be the guardian of my youngest sister and one day inadvertantly trapped her finger in the locking mechanism of her pushchair. She was about 16 months old at the time. Luckily, there was no permanent damage done. But I cried for about two days that I wasn't good enough to look after a baby and was extremely upset by the whole episode, far more than my sister or in fact my parents.
I also recently had my 2 month old son roll out of bed. He didn't fall far, only a few inches, and was completely unharmed, but I had nightmares for a week and still feel sick thinking about it.

For the record, I wouldn't put any child of any age in a bath without checking the temperature first. It's not being a good mother, it's common sense.
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17 Jul 2009, 06:59
Jessica [Private]
Post Count: 1751
Oh I know what you mean!
When I was about twelve or so, I was carrying my nephew down the hill next to my sister's apartment building to the park with him, I tripped and fell forward, and rolled a bit down the hill. (funny if it had just been me.)
I was so freaked out and scared that I had hurt my nephew, even though he was laughing and giggling about our tumble down the hill. I still worry about falling when I carry kids and it's been ten years =/
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17 Jul 2009, 18:57
Mami 2 ♥ 1
Post Count: 361
you are so right.


my son was about 3-4 months old and rolled off the sofa while we were napping. He wasnt hurt at all more scared than anything. I cried for the longest time and felt so guilty afterwards.
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17 Jul 2009, 23:22
Lauren.
Post Count: 885
You're so very right! When I was 13/14 I helped out round the daycare that I used to attend (for that particular daycare you couldn't go after age 12, but I stayed and helped around, they called me a "volunteer", lol) and I was carrying an 18 month old. I had to step over a baby gate when my foot caught and I fell. It didn't hurt the baby, mostly scared her, but I've been scarred for LIFE because of it! I still get sick to my stomach thinking about it.
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15 Jul 2009, 03:17
Minda Hey Hey™
Post Count: 330
I'm very interested to see how this goes. You gotta let us know!
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15 Jul 2009, 04:28
.Blue Bella.
Post Count: 743
You know.. thinking about it... I check the water temperature for MYSELF when I get in a bath so that I don't get burnt. I couldn't imagine not checking it for my daughter!
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15 Jul 2009, 08:35
Jessica [Private]
Post Count: 1751
Exactly! I'm always checking things I feed my sister's kids before I give it to them, because I'm so worried they'll burn their mouths.
I couldn't even fathom not checking bath water!

That poor kid :(
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15 Jul 2009, 07:24
Laurarose
Post Count: 78
I'm not quite sure how she can blame the landlord...
When running the bath I put the hot water on first for a couple of mins and then run the cold water with it and when it's ready then I put my daughter in... I figure thats what pretty much all parents do..
OH UNLESS it's that the kid turned the hot water on when the mums back was turned or something...

ANYWAYS
a good mother...
That would be my mum. Always puts us first, always ready to help us whenever we need it, looked after us to the best of her ability, stood up for us when needed, always have time for us, taught us right from wrong, taught us to respect others, and never asked for anything in return.
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15 Jul 2009, 07:34
Dreamer ♥
Post Count: 167
A good mother is a mother who looks out for their children, no matter what they do. Yes there may be wrongs to be righted but there are ways to go about it.

As for you case, everyone has already said what I wanted lol! We know how hot we like our water. A child will only scream if it's too hot or cold. Why didn't she have a bath thermonoter (sp) I have a couple! One for our house and one for nannies but I would never put Oscar in without checking the temp first!
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15 Jul 2009, 18:38
Madeline Rain
Post Count: 151
I’m back from the deposition. I think it went as well as it could have gone. The mother is very young and had her kid when she was 17. She is now 21 and has two more children. She gets government assistance for housing and other expenses. Regarding this particular case, she claims she checked the water temperature before getting the baby in. When the water started getting colder she turned on the hot water to warm it up and the child got scolded with water directly from the fawcet. Keep in mind this is not what she said in her statement to the investigator.

My client has not been deposed yet, but for what I gather based on my conversation, there have never been complaints about the water temperature and this is the first time something like this happens. We shall see. These cases have a way of backfiring. So far, though, it seems like case of a government moocher trying to get money to make up for her own stupidity.
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15 Jul 2009, 22:20
ninga
Post Count: 27
what makes no sense to me is if the water was that hot, to scald the child, it would have had steam rolling from it, and the child would have had to been under that tap for a bit to be scalded by it. ive put my hand in scalding water...only once and it was an immediately pulled out, because it was hot..duh. so, id like to know what part of the child was scalded and what degree burn they had. seems common sense says if it is how she said it is, the kid shouldnt have been scalded, if she was theree, doing her job as a mom, watching the water (steam) and using her own hand to check the temp. and not letting a 17 month old baby under that water for long enough to suffer a burn.
*sigh*
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