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Discussion Forums » General Discussion
Dating older men
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29 Mar 2009, 00:01
take me there
Post Count: 40
and...i have daddy issues haha.
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29 Mar 2009, 05:30
mixie
Post Count: 196
I prefer older men as well. It's pretty much a fact that women develop faster psychologically than men do- women are usually ready to "settle down" before men are. I kind of associate it with the fact that men can have children at a much older age than women can. I'm sure there's lots more to it. Someone once told me that my boyfriend doesn't want to grow up, and that's why he's with me. Sure I was a little insulted but then I realized she was a total stranger in an online forum that doesn't know any details about me, my boyfriend, or our relationship lol.

But when it comes to person-to-person, lots of people develop at different paces depending on their surroundings and life experiences. By 20 I had experienced lots of things most hadn't- and some things some people don't really need to experience at all. So I think I am more drawn to someone that has more experience than your average 23-year-old (my age) guy.

In the end, whatever floats your boat ^_^
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29 Mar 2009, 06:57
Krisstah
Post Count: 127
Agreed.
Taking your traditional dating sites into consideration. Most of the time you will find a guy who doesn't have a whole lot to say. His idea of a first date is something fun.. but yet he can't say what that something is.
Older guys really have an idea of what they want.
I can totally see myself just having a blast sitting on the couch with this guy watching family guy and thats awesome. No pressure.
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29 Mar 2009, 09:14
.Blue Bella.
Post Count: 743
It's interesting to see how many people here say that older men are more mature. Sometimes... but not often. A lot of older men that go or younger women go for them because they can stretch out that whole time before they 'have' to commit to a younger person... wheras when the person is older, especially closing in on 30's... they're kinda... at that point of almost desperate to commit.

Some of the older men I've dated have been so incredibly immature it's hard to believe they're even older!

My partner has just turned 23, we're 6 weeks apart in age. He knows exactly what he wants. He doesn't have to be an older man for that!
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29 Mar 2009, 11:59
SugarNSpice Surveys
Post Count: 128
I've always preferred older guys, whether they be a few months older or years older.
The few times I've dated younger guys, it turned out to be a huuuuuge disaster and a waste of my time.
=/ I've always thought that older guys were more mature, but that's not ALWAYS the case.
Anyway, to each their own, that's my philosophy.
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29 Mar 2009, 18:18
-Raiin
Post Count: 11
That's very true, not all "older" men are more mature, and it does also depend on how much older.
In my case, Dan is 38 but acts 12 sometimes LOL. He is sweet to me and he very sarcastic and immature at times.
Though, I still feel a big attachment and connection to him.

I think some it may as well be experience, it's very reassuring that the person you're with knows what to do because he has probably been in that situation before, and I am talking any situation not just sexually.

I wish some men would get on this forum and post their thoughts on the matter.
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29 Mar 2009, 20:22
Sunlight Silence
Post Count: 28
Eh, I say maturity isn't about always being mature... it's about knowing when it's okay to be immature and when it's needed to be mature! So it's perfectly fine that he sometimes is immature. :) Life would be boring without occasionally being immature!

My boyfriend is only 4 days older than me, but I still say age doesn't matter. If it's legal and you love each other and treat each other well, screw the negative nancy!
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29 Mar 2009, 22:17
Lauren.
Post Count: 885
I've always dated guys that are older than me, whether it be by a month or years. Like someone else has stated, it seems that women mature and are more ready to "settle down" than men are at a younger age. My husband is 23 and I'm 20 (he's 3 years and 5 months older than I am - he'll be 24 in July and I won't be 21 til December).
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29 Mar 2009, 22:18
Immortal Shadows
Post Count: 109
I usually date older men (oldest being 34, i'm 27). But my bf now is 19 heheh
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29 Mar 2009, 22:25
Newmommy09
Post Count: 89
Not all men in their 30s know what they want and are ready to commit and settle down..Iv been dating my 32 year old BF for about a year now..and he still isnt sure if he wants a family or not.
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29 Mar 2009, 22:26
Newmommy09
Post Count: 89
I guess I should say he knows that one day he want a fmaily..but he says hes not ready for one right now.
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29 Mar 2009, 23:33
panda bear.
Post Count: 150
I don't put an importance on age what so ever! My boyfriend is 2 years older than me (no big woop I know ;D). I date older, it seems I always have.
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29 Mar 2009, 23:46
.meg.
Post Count: 13
I, too, prefer to date older men. There's various reasons to this.

So long as both people in the relationship are legal and consenting adults, I don't see an issue with it.
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30 Mar 2009, 15:34
sunshine.
Post Count: 4
My ex was 38 and I was 19 when we got together. The guy I'm with now is 31 and I am 21 we are exactly 10 years and 2 days apart. I've always been drawn to guys who are older then me with the exception of my ex who I dated for 5 years (through high school.) After being with older guys for awhile I tend to think of guys my own age as kids. I have like zero attraction to them at all. Timmy (my bf) and I like to shock people by telling them I'm only 6 years older than his son and 10 years younger than him. Honestly though the age difference isn't even something we think of, and never really have even when we first started seeing each other.
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30 Mar 2009, 20:51
So In Love 12-12-07
Post Count: 5
I laughed to myself when i read that you're only 6 years older than your boyfriend's son, because my boyfriend's son is two years older than me. and no, i didn't mix up the placement of the words boyfriend's son and me. :-P
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31 Mar 2009, 13:32
sunshine.
Post Count: 4
yea my best friend Jess is in that situation except her fiances kids are all at least 10 years older than her. His kids are kinda weirded out by it but it doesn't matter to her or Irvin so I guess thats all that really matters. :]
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6 Apr 2009, 15:07
Lunar Sea
Post Count: 128
How does the son react to that, out of interest?
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6 Apr 2009, 15:57
So In Love 12-12-07
Post Count: 5
My boyfriend's son was kind of a bit skeptical at first ( he lives in California with his mom so he hadn't met me before I started dating his dad), but once he met me he was very cool with it. He and I get along great! He even made my engagement ring. He and his dad designed it together.
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30 Mar 2009, 21:09
Khoquetishღ
Post Count: 47
Age is nothing but a number. If you're happy with older men, then that is simply your taste. Older men are more mature, generally more career established and they don't play games and beat around the bush. Anyone would be attracted to that no matter what the age is. I say screw what everyone else thinks and do whatever makes YOU happy.
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31 Mar 2009, 15:39
SweetAngel88
Post Count: 19
I believe that age is nothing but a number... My husband is 9 years older than me... We have been best friends for 8 almost 9 years now... I was by his side when he married some one else, had kids... But kept my mouth shut about being in love with him... and than one day it finally came out... And now we are married, have a wonderful son... And a baby girl on the way... And our relationship is stronger and better than when I dated people my age...!!!
So I say go with your heart, if you are happy that is all that matters...
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31 Mar 2009, 17:48
onalevel
Post Count: 14
Im 22 and my husband is 32. You need to do what you think is right. People of all ages are at all different maturity and mental levels.
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31 Mar 2009, 18:19
Serenade Designs
Post Count: 1
I'm 22 and my bf is going to be 38 in april. We've been together over a year and a half and its working great for us. I never saw myself being with an older man but it happened and I'm in a really happy place right now.
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1 Apr 2009, 14:29
Meghans Follie
Post Count: 433
My husband is almost a full 8 years older then I am. And I know thats not as drastic as your situation... When we met I was 18 so it seemed like it was a bigger deal at that time.
A lot of people warned us when we first got married that "one day it will be a big deal". I won't lie to you and say it's never been an issue. There were times when we first got together that he would act more like a parent or an older brother which would drive me insane.
But we have been married for 12 years now, and its never an issue.
The thing that can make it hard is - his family. He was a late unexpected baby (14 years between him and the youngest of his two sisters) so trying to talk to his oldest sister is often like trying to talk to my mother at times. My neices are just a few years shy of my own age which can be both fun and fustrating.
His parents are older then my own, but younger then my grandparents - and most deff from "another era" if you know what I mean. It took a long time for them to accept me and realize I was in the marriage for the long haul.
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5 Apr 2009, 17:57
-Raiin
Post Count: 11
Dan is the same way, He is the youngest of all his siblings and his dad was 50 when he was born. He has neiced and nephews older than me, it's weird but we getalog so great.
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1 Apr 2009, 17:26
kein mitleid
Post Count: 592
Funny thing, probably most of you will feel differently when you're the age of the men you're dating (ca. 40ish). I know many 40-year-old women that completely resent 40-year-old men that date 20-ish girls. Feelings change over time. Are you girls going to be interested in 60-70 year old men when you're 40?
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