ThatDarnMiranda

10/01/2018

Let's see. Since that Bloop page started on Facebook, here we are.

I think my last entry was 2012. It's 2018. 6 years.

We've moved 2 times since last I wrote.

What important things happened while living in New York? Husband got promoted. We had a gazillion ups and downs, as a family and as a couple. But we came out on the end of it better and happier than when we were there. I was finally proactive with my own health and was diagnosed with asthma.

Colorado. Colorado was beautiful. The view from my front door was Cheyenne Mountain and some mornings it would be literally breathtaking. The weather, however, was ridiculous. Between the hail storms and wind storms, I was happy to move.

What important things happened in Colorado? Husband deployed two times. TWO times in a 2 1/2 year period. Granted, they weren't combat deployments, but it's still 2 periods of time away from home. My kiddo faced some severe anxiety, which made me thankful for military health care. He's fine now, for the most part.

My beloved dog passed away. It was one of the worst nights of my life, made only worse by the timing (I hate you, October). At the emergency vet we found out he had brain cancer, was having seizures that not even their most powerful medicine could stop. We held his paws and told him we loved him as they put him down. I cry thinking about it. As was par for the course, the dog that I couldn't stand when we first got him, became my best friend during deployment number 3, my "shoulder to cry on" during deployment number 4, then proceeded to pass away during deployment number 5. I miss him.

And....then we got Tyson. Oh, Tyson. Who literally looks identical to Horatio. Basic fawn boxer. With an attitude that is 100% different than Horatio. He's needy. Oh, is he needy. But Tyson, my dear Tyson...is the sweetest boy. He's out of the puppy stage now mostly. I love him.

Oh, I just reread my last (and only entry). In Colorado we bought another car. Actually we got 2 new cars there. Husband got an old beater, but he loves it because he can toss his kayak on the top and not feel bad about it getting scratched. And then we traded my car in on a newer car.

And now...now we're HOME. Well, as close to home as the Army can get us. We're only 150 miles from Mama's house. We've been here for a year. My husband likes his new job. He's an instructor, teaching young Lieutenants how to doing Lieutanty things. We mostly know his schedule for 19 weeks at a time. Plus, he ain't deployed and won't be for at least another 2 years. Retirement is so close, I can taste it.

The kiddo turns 13 next month. He's literally taller than me, wears a bigger shoe than his Dad. His voice is all cracky, he's attached to his phone 24/7 (well, as much as we'll let him!). As 13 year boys are, he is starting to like girls, he watches way too much YouTube, plays video games, eats me out of house and home, talks way too loudly with his friends, and is torn between liking school and being way too cool to care about school. Teenagers, man, they're a struggle. We talk a lot about decisions, emotions, friends, and more decisions. I will keep this kid as on track as I possibly can!

As for me. I keep on crafting, reading, volunteering, and trying to better myself as much as possible. Some days its a struggle. Today has been one of those days. I go to the doctor Wednesday to discuss the anxiety I have been dealing with my whole damn life.

My niece came to me a few months back and asked me to talk to her Mom (my sister) in the hopes that I can talk her into making an appointment for L (niece) for her anxiety. We literally sat on the floor crying our eyes out. Her because she's dealing with it, me because I can empathize because...spoiler alert, I deal with it too.

I begged my sis. I pleaded. I told her I understood everything L was going through. It took 2 months, but finally sissy made the appointment.

Relieved, happy tears came to my eyes. AND then a ton of bricks fell on me. It took me 2 weeks to get up the courage to talk to my best friend, my husband about it. This man, who I have loved for so many years, who I've hated at times (cause yo, that's marriage), who I couldn't live without...just hugged me and said "I wondered if you'd realize you need to make an appointment, too". Then it took another week before I could actually get the courage to make the appointment. And here we are, a day away, and my stomach already feels gross just thinking about it.

That's where we are in life. I'm still crazy, wooohooo. Older, greyer, wiser, but still just as crazy. Fancy that.

-Miranda