DeVisualise Add Fave Search
Not Logged In
0
Your Username:
Your Password:

[ sign up | recover ]

That's as impossible as nailing jello to a tree <3
by Shar

previous entry: Update

next entry: He's getting so big

Let me clarify

09/12/2011



--- Ugh ---


So I went off in my last post about how Cliff has to quit smoking and yadda yadda. I'm not going to go back to look at what I said. I was venting, I'm not going to get rid of him just cause of the pot smoking. When I'm in a massive amount of pain that just won't go away it helps me relax and the pain go away. I don't care what people think about that, I really just don't care about other people's opinions on that matter. Its the only thing that takes the pain away without putting me to sleep or making me very out of it. It really affects some people but for me it just relaxes me and thats all good. I don't expect him to change anymore, I've gone through that stage and I've learned that when you love someone its a bit of push and pull. You can't expect someone to change just because that's what you want. If you love someone you love them faults and all. So I'm not leaving him, we've broken up a lot but its never been over the weed, usually over the drinking which he's gonna have to give up or slow down on. Throwing up massive amounts of blood and being in the emergency room, then being sick for another two days hopefully knocked some sense into him. If it didn't he's just killing himself and not me. I can't really explain how hard it is to get a job here right now, even we are picky as hell and we're a fast food place. Its because we can be, there are enough people out there. Cliff mowed lawns with a guy for 17 years and when that guy tried to dick him out of money, after everything he'd done for him he just gave up and walked away. I don't blame him. Going from 500 a week when you start working for a guy to 5 dollars a yard no matter what the size is bullshit. He wasn't just mowing yards, he was running a crew, working on that guys house, race cars and everything. He just didn't want to pay him anymore for the extra stuff, said Cliff should be grateful for 5 dollars a yard. He had been living without electricity for 3 months. So he hasn't worked in 2 years cause he can't find a job, hasn't been able to. He went through a period where he didn't even try but I don't blame him, that was a hard time for both of us when you have to extremely depressed people in one house. He's been going to interviews and what not, I'm just worried he won't pass a drug test, so I asked him to stop long enough to get a job. But I know how he's thinking, who's gonna give him a job? They haven't yet. He went for an interview but not even a whisper back, not even returning his calls when he calls to ask about it. So no, I don't blame him for being aggravated and giving up the way he does. There are a lot of people out there that live off the system and have no intention of working, at least he's been looking and asking. So I'm not kicking him out, I'm not 'making' him quit smoking, cause that means I can't when I want to duh, and I'm also not interested in the comments about how weed smoking is bad. Cause really I don't give a shit.

previous entry: Update

next entry: He's getting so big

0 likes, 0 comments

[ | add comment ]

Add Comment

Add Comment

Please enter the following WHITE digits in the box below.

Confirmation Code

No comments.

Diary added to your faves.
Online Friends
Offline Friends