Blog request the First

My gut reaction to that question was "Everything!!!" I am of the opinion nobody and nothing EVER fully prepares you for marriage. The moment you stop learning in your marriage is maybe the moment you need to reexamine your marriage. My parents had been married over 20 years when my mom learned my dad preferred canned peas to frozen peas. I'm not kidding. Marriage kind of crashes into your life and you make a go at it and see what happens. Come July John and I will celebrate 3 years of marriage and 6 years of making a nuisance of ourselves in each other personal space. So I haven't been married long but I think I've been married long enough to learn a few things that made me go, "WHY WAS I NOT TOLD ABOUT THIS?!?!!"

1. It is actually possible to love someone and to hate someone all at the same time.
2. As much as they say marriage is a compromise...you know what sometimes it's a "I'm going to just shut up and we'll just do what you want and/or need right now because it's what's best at this moment." Sometimes compromise is just not an option.
3. It's totally okay and actually normal to wake up one morning and wonder, "what the hell have I done?!" It is also totally okay and totally normal to do this more than once.
4. He would be lost without me some days...and in turn some days I would be lost without him. And sometimes those days occur on the same day.
5. We are not weird for living totally individual lives. We are married, we are a team but we are still very very much our own people. Honestly if I spent as much time with him as some people think we should I might actually kill him...or he might kill me. This is not to say we don't spend time together, we spend a lot of time together. However we are not a package deal and we like it that way.
6. I never realized how much our parents marriages would influence our marriage. We knew it would to some degree but we never realized exactly to what degree.
7. Sometimes you can communicate until you're blue in the face and even then you might not be on the same page.
8. Don't interact unless we've had a snack right after work that's just a recipe for disaster.
9. Everyone says when you get married you marry not just the person you marry the persons family. THAT IS A LIE!!!!! You marry the person and that's it.
10. I need to see myself the way John sees me.
11. Your spouse does not have to be your best friend. John is not my best friend never has been and never will be. I am not John's best friend...that honour goes to Joe.
12. Marriage is what you and your spouse make of it not what everyone else tells you it should be or thinks it should be.
13. Unmarried people have a lot of opinions on what your marriage should be like. They can just go to hell. Same goes for married people.
14. None of us married folks actually know what we're doing. Whether you've been married for 20 years or 20 minutes.
15. John needs me to be my own person and I need him to be his own person. Otherwise our marriage would not last.