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In The Shadows
by Concrete Rose

previous entry: But I Do

next entry: OMG

Has it really been 4 years?

01/02/2018

During the last week or so I started thinking about BloopDiary... Wondering if it still existed, wondering if I still could remember my login info, wondering if my diary was actually still there...



BloopDiary still exists. I still remember my password. And my diary is still here.



I looked at my favorites list, and pretty much everyone hasn't updated their diary is over a year, but most of them are from 3-4 years ago, just like me.



I went back and read my last 2 recent entries (from 2013!) and I feel as if some things haven't changed, which is pretty depressing and sickening.



Sure I'm older now (31), and I FINALLY have a job that that has to with my college degree (only took me 10 years to find one), and I moved to Vegas (but, came back "home").



But what hasn't changed are my feelings for Mark. He magically appeared back in my life 2 years ago. And after 2 months I found out he was married. We haven't talked since. That doesn't mean I still don't miss him. That doesn't mean I still don't think about him every day. That doesn't mean I still don't wish I'd hear from him again. Why I cannot let go of him, I do not know.



After today I'll push this site into the back of my mind, and some day again I'll think of it. Wondering if it still exists... And if I log in and read this entry, I hope to God by then something else has changed.


previous entry: But I Do

next entry: OMG

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