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What's your secret?
by BloopSecrets

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Our Secret Life...

11/05/2011

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For the past year I have been involved in secret relationship with my best friend. We started out as friends and got closer because I was going through a divorce. When my husband and I decided to seperate my best friend and I started spending more and more time together. The problem is that my best friend is a female.... and married. I don't know what to do anymore. We are both so completly in love with each other. I have never ever loved someone the way I love her. I truly feel like she is the other half of me and if I could spend the rest of my life with her I would do it in a heart beat.

I do not and have never expected her to leave her husband. Her situation is so complicated. Sometimes I feel like a complete fool like I'm wasting my life just praying and hoping that one day she'll be able to come out to her family and we can be together. It's so utterly stressful playing this "game" when we are out in public or around friends, pretty much we have to play the game 24/7 unless we're alone.

Am I a fool to think that one day she'll take that massive risk of losing her entire family to be with me? Am I worth taking that risk? Am I a fool to stay in this relationship with her? Honestly I am really really happy in this relationship. Though it's not a relationship completly in the open this is by far the most loving, respectful, fulfilling relationship I've ever been in with someone.....

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You're not a fool. It's not like she's using you or playing you or anything. The situation just sucks. She tried to build an honest and successful life with someone (who believes she is the straight woman she says she is), and leaving him would probably devastate him for that very reason. This isn't the kind of thing you expect to happen when you marry someone. But he'll probably be more upset if he accidentally catches you guys or something, as opposed to if she just comes clean with him. He might even understand, and not make things harder than they need to be. If being together is what makes you guys truly happy, then you shouldn't have to hide it!

[Poetic Justice|0 likes] [|reply]

*hugs because I've been there - in love with my best friend.*

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[.Amber.Star|0 likes] [|reply]

but the only thing relationship isn't, is healthy. I'm not saying your feelings are wrong, because they aren't, you love who you love, but it isn't fair to you both or her husband. Sounds like you two need to have a talk about what you both expect & also talk about talking to her husband. I wish you all the luck with your relationship.

Always

[Mistress Snape|0 likes] [|reply]

listen to this WHOLE story.... cry a little--- then get motivated.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QRv9xy0aUg

[LNStar|0 likes] [|reply]

It is a most excellent relationship, but complicated.

If she's unhappy with her husband, her leaving is a good thing. But why does she have to, exactly? why can't she have both, exactly?
Why should she have to leave her family? Why should you consider not being in a relationship with her if she isn't?
If you are happy in the relationship now, would her potentially destroying her family make you happier? If not, I don't see the point.

It's always so hard to make a judgement without knowing everything. If she's happy where she is, leave it like it is. If she isn't happy, push for it. But there could potentially be a lot of hate directed your way if you become responsible for breaking up that family.

It's so hard to say what the right choice is in this situation. there are a lot of factors in play.

[eadigteon|0 likes] [|reply]

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