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This was a triumph
by Chris
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This was a triumph
by Chris

previous entry: Gym rat?

next entry: A lot to say with nothing to say

The village

06/22/2025

What happened to the village I was promised before I had kids? What happened to all the grandparents who promised to chip in when we were sick, overwhelmed, or needed a break? It seems like when the going got tough, every single one of them disappeared on me. I hate to whine, or act like our parents have some sort of responsibility to our children, but like a part of me feels like they do. I remember spending not just a 1-2 weekends a month at my grandparents, but entire summers. 2.5 whole months of being flown to another state so my mom could get a break, but now that I have children, I'm lucky to have one weekend day.

Something has to give. I just need a day of silence.

previous entry: Gym rat?

next entry: A lot to say with nothing to say

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I can appreciate exactly how you feel. My problem, however, is that one set of grandparents lives 4400km away and the other set lives 1000km away. I have very few people where I currently live, and two of those people are moving this summer. And, my husband is away for another 5 and a half months. I know if we were closer to either set of grandparents, they would help out whenever they could. I don't regret my kid, but there are days lately that I just want 24-48 hours where I'm not responsible for anyone or anything.

[Scruddle|0 likes] [|reply]

I don't mean to intrude, but what were the circumstances that lead you to be so far away from your family if your husband travels for work anyway?

[Chris|0 likes] [|reply]

I'm a military spouse.

[Scruddle|0 likes] [|reply]

you can still love your kid and need time to yourself, too. It's actually quite healthy to have alone/adult time here and there. Doesn't mean you're a bad parent or you don't love your kid.

[Greta GarbageStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Even when I was living close to grandparents they were never active in terms of giving us breaks or date nights. It is a different set of grandparents then we had. I vow to be like the grandparents of old

[*Forever Changing*Star|0 likes] [|reply]

Grandparents are all different I suppose. Mine were very hands on. My mom had to move in with her parents with me and my brother (me 5 him 2.5) when my father left us. No questions asked. They took us whenever my mom wanted. I always wanted to go there. When we moved within walking distance I was constantly walking over there. Even walked to their house on Mondays after school in middle school, had dinner with them, and walked home right after. I didn't beg to sleep over friends houses, I begged to stay with them. All my happiest childhood memories involve them. They were never just grandparents, they were like a second set of parents. They helped raise us. If I had kids and they were still alive they'd be the same with their great-grandkids, too. And my mother definitely would have been the same kind of grandmother as her mother was. My MIL, probably would have been the opposite.

[Greta GarbageStar|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: Gym rat?

next entry: A lot to say with nothing to say

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