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an empty frame.'s Diary
by an empty frame.

previous entry: Trust him to fetishize Super Mario Bros.

next entry: So tired too.

Umm...

02/05/2011

[NB I actually wrote this on the 3rd]

I've begun compulsively picking at my skin and I have infected scabs and craters where I've picked off layers of skin all over my legs. They're rather painful but I can't stop doing it. I feel like there's something in the wound I need to get out and then it'll feel better, even though I know if I don't leave it alone it'll never heal. I'm freaking out about it while Luke thinks it's funny. I love it when he laughs at me makes me feel better that he finds my "quirks" are amusing rather than going O_O "you are so fucked up" He did tell me though if I didn't stop performing surgery on my legs he'd confiscate them.

Guess what! I've gained weight! I don't hate myself because of it!! Which in itself is a big achievement for me but I'm not thinking too deeply about thatttttt. I assume the picking thing is related to it too. But anyway. IM FITTING MY CLOTHES A LOT NICER NOW ANNNDDDD IT OCCURED TO ME EARLIER IF I GAIN ENOUGH AND GET MORE FUNCTIONAL IE. CAN STAND UP FOR HOURS AT A TIME ... I can get a normal job! I don't know what but like... If I had a normal job Luke could completely fucken ruin my ass and it wouldn't MATTER!!!!! Heeelloooooooo!

previous entry: Trust him to fetishize Super Mario Bros.

next entry: So tired too.

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i've always picked at myself. so many random scab scars. i'm forever thinking there's puss or an ingrown hair so i won't leave myself alone. even though it hurts and itches like fuck.

yay standing! and ass ruining!

[& skull.Star|0 likes] [|reply]

Congrats on the weight gain!!

[.Amber.Star|0 likes] [|reply]

Yay! I'm proud of you for gaining weight and being ok with it! thats a huge step.. way to go!!

[theregoesmyheart|0 likes] [|reply]

Congrats on the weight gain!!!

[Saoirse!|0 likes] [|reply]

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