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In The Secret Garden
by Ivy Divine

previous entry: >.< A Family Weekend For the First Time

next entry: >.< Renaissance Faire, Birthday Party & Meeting Friends

>.< Adjustments, Needs, Changes

04/30/2015






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~♥ Today I'm Thankful For...     My relationship, which is amazing!




⊱჻ೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋೋ჻⊰



      This past weekend the munchkin and I spent our time with the Boyfriend. I hadn't seen him since Sunday morning when we left to come home for work. It is really odd for me to miss someone like I have missed him since seeing him last. On top of that, I had an issue with both of my banks that I had to resolve - one was pretty simple, I just had to wait for an unauthorized charge to get refunded. The other was like pulling teeth the last 2 days to get it resolved! I am going to change banks because of that alone. This week is bank shopping. I had to keep talking to people and keep arguing to get an error fixed. It was finally resolved today at 5. This added A TON of stress to me the last 2 days. On top of that, one of the parents of the kids I watch hadn't paid me for last week or this week yet. I finally got paid today, after a week and a half of work only because I kept texting the dad about it! The mom was always responsible about paying but the dad is not. He has this attitude, like he looks down on everyone else, and he doesn't seem to respect that this is my business. Getting paid is always hard. I am sending out a letter this week telling parents that payments HAVE to be received by the end of each week or their child cannot return. I'm not sure how it will go over, but I can't wait a week and a half to get paid. I have my own bills to pay!



      I missed my Boyfriend, I was dealing with 2 bank issues, I hadn't been paid for work, I had work to deal with, plus all my other stresses. So it's been a hard 2 days. I have been grumpy and smart assy because of it. I am so not used to being considerate of anyone else on the day to day so it's been hard for me to adjust to trying not to be a smart ass grump with him. It's really hard! I normally say and do whatever I feel like. On a bad day I'm a bitch. On a good day I'm nice. I've been doing things my way for YEARS. So this is a huge change for me. And honestly, I sucked at it the last 2 days. I was miserable. I almost canceled on us going to see him tonight because I was in such a grumpy pissed off mood. But I kept my word and we went down to his place. I'm glad we did! We went out to eat together and then hung out at his place together. I got a little alone time with him while the kiddo watched Justice League, but not alone enough for the dirty stuff. He did bite me a lot though which was nice. I needed some of that after the last few days.



      He is a really good guy. He makes me happy, he cares about me, we have chemistry, and we have a great future ahead of us. It is just a big adjustment for me. And we both have our issues to work out, like fear of the other person leaving. I am determined to stick with this and see it through, but that doesn't mean it will be a cake walk for me. I need to find ways to get my frustration and pissy moods out when they come up so I am not so bitchy to him on bad days. I need him and want him in my life, so I don't want to be bitchy at him. And I really don't want to screw things up with him. I want him to be happy and I don't want to stress him out. He's so good to me and keeps telling me I'm worth it, but that doesn't mean I want things to be difficult because of me. I want to work really hard at finding a way not to take my bad moods out on him. It's hard because I'm an empath so I feel things SO strongly, which makes it hard to control and keep from being taken out on people around me. My goal the next week is to work really hard on that and finding ways to get out my anger and frustration so I can stay calm with those in my life.



      We'll be seeing him again this weekend, starting with Friday after work. We're going over to eat dinner all together, then my mini me is going to a friend's to be babysat for the night so we can have one alone. It will be a night filled with dirty stuff, sex, and BDSM. I am SO excited!! Saturday morning we are going to pick the kiddo up, then go to a Renaissance Faire. I'm excited for that too! After that we're going to a friend's birthday party for her son and my Boyfriend will meet her and her family for the first time. I'm a little nervous about it but not much. Honestly, I don't really care what anyone thinks of him. I adore him and I want to be with him, that's all that matters. Meeting his friend and his family was decently easy so I'm sure this will be too. Saturday night we'll go home together again, and then Sunday late morning I have to work. I'm looking forward to it! This will be my 3rd time spending nights with him and my kiddo's 2nd. I like that we do that every week and get in quality time together. I'm not used to wanting to spend so much time with someone but it's really nice to do so. Now I will be counting down until Friday evening! Impatiently I might add....



ღ Belle Ivy Rose ⊰  



Life is pain. Embrace it. Live it. Feel the thrill of falling and the security of rising. Make the most of every moment. Live and love like you'll never let it go. ♥ ~Me


♥ Click here to visit my Etsy Shoppe! {^.^} ♥


჻ೋ♥ Click the picture below to visit my blog site: Living, Creating, Believing ♥ೋ჻






previous entry: >.< A Family Weekend For the First Time

next entry: >.< Renaissance Faire, Birthday Party & Meeting Friends

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It's so interesting to me reading your diary... It's like a biography being written and I'm reading along...which, ok, that's exactly what it is

Meditation, workingout, listening to music are some ideas I can offer as suggestions you can use to combat that bitch inside.

[A RedSox FanStar|0 likes] [|reply]

Ahhhh yes my dear, how to tame the inner bitch.... let me know if you figure it out than then give the recipe please.

[twistedlady|0 likes] [|reply]

Oh lawdy girl ME TOO!! Lol

[twistedlady|0 likes] [|reply]

why do banks have to be so difficult!!!?? It's not annoying &I in sorry you had to go through that.

I'm so excited for you & the boyfriend. Most of all in glad Chole likes him.

[fearless♥love|0 likes] [|reply]

I hope you have a good time with your alone time.

I don't understand how banking can be so difficult. It's like they do that on purpose and get angry when you do have a problem.

Thank you for your comment as well, sorry it took me so long to get back to ya.

[Sin|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: >.< A Family Weekend For the First Time

next entry: >.< Renaissance Faire, Birthday Party & Meeting Friends

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