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THROUGH THE EYES OF THE BEHOLDER
by Ryukotsusei

104 comments

the mind mine

This place was cool before they let assholes run wild on it.

[Project Overkill]

Too many scars for me to hide

strangely it does help some, not like talking to someone about it but it does help to just chuck feelings into something.

[Ryukotsusei]

Too many scars for me to hide

i hope it helps!!

[twistedlady]

The new beginning!

Come on back jack

[Project Overkill]

The new beginning!

I know I don't come on here much, but you need to come on here more often and update. Sheesh!!

[Broken Wings]

The new beginning!

Happy new year =)

[rubus]

Anti-social failure....

It seems like as we get older, we grow apart from the people we used to be close to... especially if you're in different "places" of your lives. It's hard to stay in touch sometimes. It sucks, that's for sure.

[Sunlight Silence]

Anti-social failure....

I think if you try and get in touch with the other people, the ones that didn't avoid you, you'll be pleasantly surprised. =)

[rubus]

Trying to understand part 2

If they move on without warning, then they didn't feel the same way you felt about them. My relationships always start with friends first, and I usually wait for them to ask me. And if they were to 'move on quickly', then I'd know they weren't worth it.

I've been in a new relationship for almost two months. So I can't really answer #2. But I feel like it might last a while. =) I guess because, they make you see the world in a different way, they are beautifully supportive, they understand you inside and out.

[rubus]

Trying to understand part 2

For your first question, there's no one way to love right. For some people, it comes out of the blue... one minute, they're friends, the next, they're making out, and the next minute, they're getting married and don't know what hit them. For other people, it started as a blind date, or meeting at a bar, etc. You can't decide to do it one way and look for that to happen. The second you start trying to make it happen is the second it doesn't work. No matter what the scenario is - whether you're friends or just meeting for the first time, or anything in between - love just happens with no warning, no bias, no choice. You don't choose who you love or how to love. Love chooses you. Actually, love often punches you in the face and knocks you out . My advice to you is if you decide you like a person and would like to try dating, be open and honest with them as soon as you know you want to try. If that person feels the same way and is ready or feels the same way but wants to wait a little while longer or just doesn't have those feelings, then you'll know for better or worse. Sometimes you can get really hurt by wearing your heart on your sleeve. In fact, that will be the outcome 99% of the time for anyone. However, that 1% of the time that your heart isn't crushed is 100% worth it in the end. We go through a lot of relationships and heartache before finding the right person to settle down with for life. The best things in life require the greatest risk. The best things in life also aren't predictable or able to be planned. James and I moved in together a week and a half after meeting each other. We just knew it was right and meant to be. Everyone else thought we were being crazy and stupid, but when you know, you know. Most people aren't as lucky to know so quickly and that's okay too.
As for question number two, Love makes you stay. If you truly love each other, then those stupid fights and silly pet peeves no longer matter. You laugh about it afterwards. Laughter helps too, by the way. If you can't laugh about how stupid you were being with each other or at how annoying something about that person can be, then you've put up a roadblock. Sometimes, loving a person so much it hurts is what causes the two of you to have stupid fights but it's that same love that keeps you together.

I am a strong believer in "Everything happens for a reason." I've seen enough of it in my life to have no choice but to believe in it. The three worst things that have happened to me in my life led me to right here, right now. I can't imagine my life any different. If any ONE of those three things didn't happen, I wouldn't be here.

Hang in there. You WILL find the right person. It may take a while, but she'll come along. Don't settle for anyone. Don't settle for cheating, especially. If a person has to cheat, they don't deserve you.

[Sunlight Silence]

Trying to understand part 2

o.0 open relationshp ahahaha thats stupied way to say xD soo i guess ur saying wooo jus go n be a pimp it wont be call cheating well i guess u can do that but think about it most pple are not out there for a "open relationship" they are mostly out there for a long term relationship...they want someone to love n be love someone they can call their own witout "sharing" thats wat u call love. Love is something pple want only for themself n their partner stupied...im guessing ur doing that urself cuz u wouldnt kno wat a real love would be thats sad xD but eh thats ur lfe i guess...

Trying to understand part 2

If you 'don't mind' cheating (or would even consider tolerating it...) why don't you consider an 'open relationship'? Where you're both free to see other people but are completely honest with each other? Some people just naturally attract cheaters. It sucks, but it's true.

I like the idea of friends before lovers, but unfortunately like you said, if you take too long you might blow it. I don't think that "Friends first" can really be planned successfully. It has to happen naturally- You have a friend, and it turns into something more. I am in a successful relationship, and that's exactly how it happened

[Poetic Justice]

trying to understand...

Personally, I think there is NO excuse for cheating. If a person can't restrain themselves around other attractive people, then they owe it to their significant other to break it off so they don't hurt them more than is required. To me, there are 2 things a guy can do that deserve NO second chance - the first is cheating, the second is physical abuse. The first offense of either of these two actions will be the last because it will be over.

[Sunlight Silence]

trying to understand...

i think he would have to cheat on me and even then it would be hard to do...

[Earth~Goddess]

trying to understand...

Something that would make me cheat was if I felt something was missing (which is possible even in very good relationships). That said, however, I have never cheated and don't see myself doing it in the near or distant future. I think it's much better to talk to the person you're currently with and see if you can resolve the issues there first. If you can't, then you end the relationship and move on.

[rubus]

trying to understand...

I've never cheated in a relationship, but I know I have thought about it... my reason being: I like sex a little more on the wild side... kinky kind of stuff... hot wax, restraints, etc... my current boyfriend isn't into that at all. I love him with all my heart, and we've had conversations about him trying the stuff, and he said he would (which, he hasn't yet) but he's really more of a 'vanilla' kind of guy. I have a guy friend who, not realising I was in a relationship said "Hey, you should come over and I can do *explicit content* and then maybe we can *more content* and to be honest, the only reason I didn't go was because I know that I am completely in love with my current boy friend and never want to hurt him. I also know that if I weren't in love with him, or if I were tired of the relationship, or if I just wasn't turned on by him any more, I would have been at my other friends house doing all matter of kinky things.

[Ice Vampire]

trying to understand...

I've only ever cheated when the relationship is so torched that I no longer feel like I'm in a relationship. I'm not proud of this, of course, especially the times when the other person disagreed with my relationship assessment. I should've just manned up and broke up with them. Nobody can keep me dating them against my will, regardless of what it felt at the time.
In a good relationship, sometimes people cheat because it's too good, and they don't feel they deserve it so they blow it. Sometimes it's to make sure that they are committed, as weird as it sounds. That's where you get the more stereotypical male response of "she meant nothing to me, baby", which is to say I f*cked her and you're better and now I know. A lot of people cheat because they have a disconnect between sex and love. Some people cheat just because they're not monogamous, and that's not very culturally acceptable and so they try and fail.

[a little one]

trying to understand...

I suppose the reasons for cheating could differ. Some people cheat because they get off on getting away with something. If that's the kind of person you're dealing with, run away. Some people cheat because they find someone else so incredibly attractive they can't help themselves.
Many of us are attracted to other people no matter how good the relationship we're in is. The better of us talk it out with our partners. I personally have an arrangement with my husband that allows us to have other partners. We don't consider this cheating because it is done without lies, with full knowledge and consent of all parties. This arrangement is certainly not for everyone, though, and it requires a lot of communication and self-examination.

[polywog]

Understanding trust...

Most people suck thats why i avoid them. Very few people i can actually stand. You are one of the awesome ones wilbert so dont forget that!

[Project Overkill]

Understanding trust...

Trust is tricky. Forgiveness and truly being apologetic are key. It works both ways. Being bitter will get you no where, unless you want to be miserable. Although, if you are already miserable, it's hard to trust again. You've got to find a way to break the cycle! I hate to see people feel bad. I hope you feel better. Have a nice day. (PS random noter, I am.)

[Panoramic Prism]

Understanding trust...

If I remember correctly, yes we have. The place I have an interview with today is Cutting Edge Technology, not sure what they do, but it's not Sam's Club and there for I don't care what they do. Better pay, better hours. Lol Target called me today saying they wanted me as seasonal help, and I said that I would go in for an interview. Soooo even if this first interview goes bad, and I don't get the job at Cutting Edge, at least I have another interview to look forward to. Granted it's not the best job and it's only seasonal, but it's something, right?

[Ice Vampire]

Understanding trust...

Yes, and I put in for Meijer, Target, Baby R Us, Toys R Us, and pretty much every place I found on Craigslist. lol

[Ice Vampire]

Had a scare...

damn thats crazy. hope you get better. You and my sister got mad problems with your health...sheesh

[Project Overkill]

Had a scare...

Random:

That is scary!! I hope the meds are working for, as much as you dont like being on them, hopefully they will help out some.

[sincerely me♥]

Had a scare...

My gosh! That is frightening. =( I wonder why your blood pressure did that? I hope the meds are working... I know it sucks being on meds you have to take every day, but I believe they're the best thing for you... you don't want your BP climbing up that high again.

[rubus]

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