I already said goodnight but...

05/17/2011

I'm obsessed. I don't know how long this will stick but i'll try. So i was just crying, i was texting my mom and it really hurts that i can't just walk to her room and tell her all the things i want. I try to pretend that my parent's divorce was so long ago that it doesn't phase me and most of the time it doesn't (well at least i can go ten minutes without thinking of it, but it does affect every aspect of my life. Like when i want to do things with friends on the weekend and they think i'm blowing them off when i say i have to go to my moms when really i just really need my mom. This is really rushed and sloppy. Ughhhh i have english in the morningwhich should be my favorite class because i really enjoy writing and reading and grammar (i bet you couldn't tell from the mess this is) but i'm too much of a fuckup to put effort into anything so i'm basically failing. I kinda really hate myself...

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(Reply to ur comment, thanks but that's actually tyrics to a song by the band "Extreme")
about this post; You're not a fuck up. My parents split when I was 11, I felt the same way you did when I was a teenager. I stayed with my mom and sister but it was known that my mom favored my sister. I wished I could be with my dad and I threatened that to my mom a few times when we started arguing really bad... Now looking back I know without a doubt that staying with my mom was the best thing. If your parents thought it was a good idea, hell, if the COURT thought it was a good idea for you to be with your mom, that's where you'd be.
I DID fail school. I was 17 and pretty much a sophmore, I skipped so much school they took my mom to court and the judge said I was so far behind that it would be best for me to drop out and get my GED. (if not I would have been a 21 y/o Sr. in high school) So I dropped out and took GED classes. I passed the test on the 1st try, moved out when I was 20, now I'm 25, living half a country away, and going to college to get my RN.
I know life seems tough right now but it does get better.
Add me on FB chickie, I'm here for u anytime u need to chat.

[mae_mcawesome|0 likes] [|reply]

lol I guess it would help if I put my email address???
BunFufu2@yahoo.com

[mae_mcawesome|0 likes] [|reply]

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