wel my girlfriends turnd in2 an asshole and i think im startn 2 go back in2 a depression i cant do anything bout it cuz i promised her i wouldnt do "that" again and i told her that id start being faithful but of course she dont believe me but then again who would god i wouldnt even trust me but thers nothn i can do...she said shed never go back 2 smoken again but once we split she startd up and then swore she stopd wen we got back 2gether and then she found out that i had cheated on her so she said she only did it 4 those 2 days that i had pisd her off but then she also said that she wuz going 2 contuine 2 do it just not round me and the baby but then a few days ago she said she swore that she hasnt dun it since the night she went 2 the bar but i dont wut 2 believe anymore i dont have any proof that she is smoken or doing any tabaco products at all its just my gut telling me that she is doing it but i realy do wana trust her and believe her that she aint but i dont no...she doesnt do shit 2 help me anymore all she wants 2 do is slep and freakn work if i do get 2 slep n 4 1 day she comes up with some stupid excuess like im tired i have a headache i hve 2 work doubles so she winds up staying n the bedroom after takeing care of bear so of course i dont get 2 slep cuz i cant slep if thers noise so after like 10mins of tryn 2 slep i just freakn give n and get up and go figure let her slep she says that shes going 2 start helpin me out more but i have yet 2 see that happen i give it til after jaedins born and if things dont change 4 the better im just gana leave im tired of being put under all this stress and not haveing any help with any of it now that its summer im haveing 2 reali on my mom 2 take care of bear all the time cuz i just dont have the energy 2 do it talitha stard taken every thursday off so that could b my day but of course that still has yet 2 happen so ive just given up on her i dont have any faith left n her im tryn 2 distance my self from her but its just so hard wen i luv her so much but im just going 2 have 2 suck it up and deal with it until after jaedins born i no nothns going 2 change so y i even bother geting my hopes up i have no idea...well until next time see ya | 
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