Tv is boring.... On demand is being a jerk... I am bored but don't want to go to bed yet.
2 months till I turn 22 years old.
I really wish I could just let it go but my mind keeps going back to today when Ian said "but look at her nails is picks and chew them" it really got to me like for real when I heard him say that had he been a little closer he would have got knocked over I turned around so fast Travis jumped I told him to shut his face what I really wanted to say was fck off a$$hole but that kinda talks not for the work place  .
Lee Imed me asking if I forgot all about him since I don't call or write.... umm well I never called but ok. Just so over random hook ups been 9 months since I last saw him and I honestly plan to never see him again.
I don't wanna sleep but I feel like thats whats going to happen... I should have got something to drink but I need to be on money lock down like for real I did waste $12 at the store tonight I bought my mom a 2 liter and got 2 $5 scratch tickets I did win $5 back so I only wasted $7 and my mom gave me a dollar so I only wasted $6... If I don't spend anything except paying bills for the next 4 weeks I will be okay to restart paying bills! its a ugly cycle I swear. I am a month behind on cell phone and cable EVERY month can't get caught up. I paid $20 on my phone bill today.
Bills:
Cable- $144
Phone-$176
Rent-$330
In my pocket I have $105 My father is giving me $50 for the phone bill so thats $155 that covers the cable +10.
Next week my check will be $134. my Mother said she would give me $50 for her part of the cell bill so that will be $184 that will cover phone bill +8.
The next week my check will be $134 I will have this check and the next to pay rent my checks will only come to $268....330-268=$62 short.
My mothers friend asked me to drive her to the doctors in two weeks she said she would give me $50 so I would only be $12 short on rent unless I can save the little bit I have left over each week which I will more then likely have to use for gas in the car I have 90% of the time!
Then the following week will be the 13th time to pay cable again..... then cell phone then rent..... Round and Round it goes..... | 
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