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Discussion Forums » General Discussion
What makes a good mother?
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14 Jul 2009, 17:49
Madeline Rain
Post Count: 151
I have to prepare for a deposition tomorrow. The case involves a child who was burned during a bath and the mother is now suing her landlord. Anyway, in her statement, the mother says 6 times “I’m a good mother”. Now, since I’m not a mother, I’m going to reach out to you bloopers with this question: What makes a good mother?

The more you contribute, the more ass I will kick at my deposition.
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14 Jul 2009, 17:53
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
Ooh, I see drama coming!

I'm not a mother. But I think a good mother is one who puts her children first... who listens and cares but also disciplines appropriately... who doesn't put her child at risk (I feel this includes mothers who feed their kids junk food regularly and who smoke with children in the house, or use drugs) and tries to protect them, but without smothering them and not allowing them to experience the world. I also believe a good mother encourages her child to have goals in life, and supports their attempts to achieve thoe goals.
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14 Jul 2009, 18:51
Aiure
Post Count: 308
Well said. I agree completely. :)
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14 Jul 2009, 22:41
- cynthia -
Post Count: 45
Im a mother & I couldnt agree with you more! :) A mother's instinct is to protect & provide for her child. They should always come first.
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14 Jul 2009, 17:54
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
As for your specific case... I think a good mother checks the temperature of a bath BEFORE putting her child in it!
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14 Jul 2009, 17:58
Madeline Rain
Post Count: 151
I can't really discuss the specifics of the case but it's more complicated than just checking the temperature of the bath. In any case, I don't mean to start drama. I just need to come up with about 100 questions to ask this woman tomorrow, and since she put the quality of her "mothering" out there for scrutiny, I suspect most of those questions are going to revolve around that.
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14 Jul 2009, 18:46
Transit
Post Count: 1096
Agreed.
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14 Jul 2009, 20:59
YourFavoriteMistake
Post Count: 15
I was going to say that! lol. She's an idiot
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14 Jul 2009, 20:17
Acid Fairy
Post Count: 1849
Why is the mother suing the landlord? Did the landlord put the child in the bath?!
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15 Jul 2009, 03:42
Makayla
Post Count: 751
A good mother is someone who is put on earth to love, cherish, and PROTECT a child. I have never put Jordyn in a bath without checking the temp beforehand. I don't know why in the world anyone would put a baby/child in a bath without doing so. Of course there are always going to be accidents, but as a mother your job is to be the one that prevents everything possible from happening. If she let something like this happen right in front of her eyes, and being so careless, then Lord only knows what will happen in this child's future. Not everyone is cut out to be a mother, you have to be responsible, self-less, and patient. If she would have shown any of these traits while bathing her child he would have not been burned. There really is no excuse why this should have happened. Does she just jump right into a bath without checking the temp? Then why would you put your helpless child in there? She sounds very ignorant.
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15 Jul 2009, 16:35
*~Loving You~*
Post Count: 507
*sighs* i swear some people shouldnt even be parens...

if they keep an eye on the kid all times so they dont get kidnapped thats how the kidnapping happens sadly they dont keep an eye on the kids, dont trust anyone on the baby sitting till the kids are older so they dont get shooked or whatever. (if it was up to me i dont think anyone could trust anyone, maybe unless the grandparents and the parents since they grew up around that)
dont smoke around the children -- devlops ashama, put them in good education, safe evironment. put the kids in first even if the husband came first, be able to discpline the child, but not by slapping em or spanking them theres other way to discipline them without abuse. make them learn responsiblities when they are young such as 6 years old take out the trash or do little stuff and build the way up to great housing skills, responisblities, put the kids on the limit if giving a cell phone i would put only certain numbers they can call and get and mintues are important. be strict, fair punishments if they did wrong when they are older. get thier respect instead of being thier friend when they dontlisten to you

and for the mother suing the LAND LORD is CRAZy, i mean...she SHOULD have checked the tempture, therefore she didnt so that doesnt make her a good mother...

everyone has thier methods of raising kids, but it is SO embarrassing to see a mother with children with them such as two or three and they are UNCONTROLABLE at the store.. screaming crying

oh if ur going places as the church, or someplace thats quiet like a wedding, funeral, or school plays or whatever it is SURE as hell it is ANNOYING!!!! watch the church on tv, make your husband or the baby daddy take the baby while ur at a wedding would yah? and be sure the baby is clean ALL the time
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15 Jul 2009, 16:39
Transit
Post Count: 1096
So basically, babies shouldn't be allowed to leave the house? I don't see how a baby crying or cooing could annoy you to be fair. I think your getting at not taking babies out, but your post is very hard to read.
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16 Jul 2009, 14:44
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
You're saying parents shouldn't attend WEDDINGS or FUNERALS (or CHURCH!) incase their baby CRIES?!?

What if the couple getting married or the person who has died was a close friend of BOTH parents? Why should one of them be denied the chance to participate in the happy day? That sounds rather selfish to me.

Personally I'd much rather have a baby cry during my wedding than have my close friends have to miss out. That's ridiculous.
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16 Jul 2009, 14:46
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
I'm also curious as to how depriving the parents of the right to attend church can possibly be translated into being a good parent?!? Surely being a good parent is putting the child first? How is keeping them in the house the entire time of any benefit to the child?
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16 Jul 2009, 14:48
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
it is SO embarrassing to see a mother with children with them such as two or three and they are UNCONTROLABLE at the store.. screaming crying

Have you EVER cared for a baby or a toddler?? That's what they do! It's natural. It's not always a sign of bad parenting (although the way in which the mother deals with it may be).
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16 Jul 2009, 16:35
*~Loving You~*
Post Count: 507
I know people who can control their toddlers I know babies cry but I spoke my opinon that was that and for babies why would u bring it to a quiet place and it cries it irrates a lot of people

Toddlers r able to be controlled they shouldn't even be throwing a fit just because they can't get something I just think it is embarrassing I never said to keep it in the house and not take them out I'm just sayin they need to control the kids
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16 Jul 2009, 16:47
Transit
Post Count: 1096
You'll be eating humble pie if you ever have children. Toddlers are not able to be controlled, I'd like to see you control all the toddlers in our family.
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16 Jul 2009, 16:49
*~Loving You~*
Post Count: 507
...wats a humble pie?

whats the big deal? i spoke my opinon if my toddlers cant behave then they cant go out with me...
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16 Jul 2009, 17:02
Transit
Post Count: 1096
Like eating your own hat. If you have kids though, seriously enjoy spending the first four years of their lives not being able to leave the house, there is no such thing as a toddler or small child that does not play up in public.
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16 Jul 2009, 17:06
*~Loving You~*
Post Count: 507
...that wasnt what i was saying... i was saying "control em" and they CAN be controlled my friends have toddlers and they are like perfect angels but they behave themselves when they are in public.. it is realli sad to see them running ALL around the store being loud and the parent is NOT with them.

i aint commin back here, my opinon is said, there is no right and wrong for opinons..
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16 Jul 2009, 20:16
~RedFraggle~
Post Count: 2651
You mean your friend's toddlers NEVER EVER cry in public? WOW... I'd love to meet a child like that!

You weren't talking before about kids running around the store being loud without parents. Of course parents should be responsible and keep their kids with them while shopping. But what you said was that kids that cry in public is a sign of parents not being able to control them. Which is incorrect. Kids CRY! It's how the parent deals with the situation that determines their abilities as a parent.
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17 Jul 2009, 06:56
Jessica [Private]
Post Count: 1751
In your original post you said you shouldn't take children somewhere if they're "Screaming, crying".
Babies can't speak, they cry.

Running around the store being loud isn't "screaming, crying". That's being a brat. Two totally different things =/
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17 Jul 2009, 13:48
Lily-my one and only
Post Count: 62
i don't know about all churches, but two churches i went to growing up had a special room for parents with babies and toddlers. it was sound proof, but had a speaker system so they could hear the priest, and there was a glass wall so they could see everything.
and anyways, if you keep your child sheltered and away from everywhere they might act up, then how will they ever learn?
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18 Jul 2009, 22:02
Estella
Post Count: 1779
WELL, THERE CAN BE A RIGHT AND WRONG, YO. LIKE, IF YOU SAID YOUR OPINION WAS THAT THE EARTH IS FLAT, THAT WOULD BE WRONG, BECAUSE SCIENTISTS HAVE PROVED OTHERWISE. SIMILARLY, I COULD HAVE THE OPINION THAT YOU ARE REALLY A BOY, AND THAT WOULD EITHER BE RIGHT OR WRONG, YO.
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18 Jul 2009, 19:34
Makayla
Post Count: 751
Agreed. I have a two year old and if someone ever told me to control my child when she was crying, I would tell them to shove it. That's what babies do, at 2 & 3 years old they are still babies.
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