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an empty frame.'s Diary
by an empty frame.

previous entry: I don't want to die but I don't want this life

next entry: More than good sex

All bad news

06/17/2011

Young and I are going to break up tonight (if I'm awake by the time he gets in, which I probably won't be). I really don't want to but ummm I don't know the whole thing just hurts. Blah...

I asked him if he wanted me to fly over and visit him in [where he is now living] and he (eventually, after much avoiding the subject) said no. I told him how that made me feel and he said he can't do this anymore, so I said fine, when you get home, let's talk. *sigh* I love his fucking guts and this sucks.

Still no news from Luke re: whether or not we are breaking up as well. The likelihood of me being able to deal with two breakups in as many weeks is probably better than dealing with just one, to be honest. But I can't predict how I'll cope with it to be honest. I'm hoping I'll get detached.

If this new legislation is brought in that is calling for prostitutes to have their fingerprints on file I won't be able to continue doing sex work (not legally anyway... and this isn't something I want to do illegally). Fucking hell.

previous entry: I don't want to die but I don't want this life

next entry: More than good sex

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wtf i've not heard of that legislation. why are they doing that?

i'm sorry you have to break up with young

[& skull.|0 likes] [|reply]

It might just be in WA. I'll have to check. I'll prob write more about it later cos it's gonna fuck shot up for me. I don't want my fingerprints anywhere I'm not a bloody criminal.

[an empty frame.|0 likes] [|reply]

I had to get school done, so my advice is mostly useless now, but here it is.
There's being supportive, and then there's knowing what you can take. If he can't be what you need, then you have to take care of you. Something about teaching a donkey to sing? It hurts you, and just pisses off the donkey.
You really need to take care of you.
One of my favourite songs... "I cannot save you. I can't even save myself." It's not your job to fix him. He's a baby, and he's going to stubbornly make his own mistakes until he's done. Same as we all do.
If I could kidnap you up to Canadaland, where we lack the population density for much application of nanny-laws, I would.

[a little one|0 likes] [|reply]

I think I've just been looking for excuses to Stay with him because I love him. Trying to convince myself it'll be worth it in the end and we'll live happier ever after.

[an empty frame.|0 likes] [|reply]

You can't stay with him when he's not here. You have to let him come to you. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. Maybe you won't be there when he does.
Love is bullshit. Seriously.
*hug*

[a little one|0 likes] [|reply]

Ssssooo bullshit omggg I love him he's perfect grrr I'm so angry and hurt and just keep saying the same crap over and over!!!

[an empty frame.|0 likes] [|reply]

previous entry: I don't want to die but I don't want this life

next entry: More than good sex

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