One! ♥

02/06/2010

This is seriously like my tenth diary. I dont know why I always make so much. But here I am. I am sixteen and I am not going to say my name in case any of my friends happen to come across it one day. I am a female, yes. I love writing diaries. I just can not stick to them. I forget, get lazy, and just dont write. But for now on I am going to try and start writing more.

I am a sophomore in highschool. The principle claims that next year is the most important year so we need to plan carefully. I am no good in school but I am trying and trying. I am going to try to get a 3.0 or better. So that why I can go to a good college. (: AND right now a scholarship being offered at our school is getting 3.0's and higher and graduating with 26 credits. The way I planned it out to be, I am going to be graduating with 26 credits, and now the only problem is... getting a 3.0. I want to become a teacher, also. An elementary school teacher. This just became a recent dream. I have been going to the kindergarden room for study hall and been helping out. I get to do more than most student assisants do, like filing papers, correcting papers, ect. I get to actually do things with this students. And I love it. I really want to do this.
But then I think about it.
No I want to be a doctor.
No I want to be a physcologist
No how about a lawyer?
I have so much things I want to be, and I just want to get a deadset goal! Ugh. God I am so young and already am trying to plan out everything.

I also want to go to a christian college. Why? Because I have always wanted to be a GOOD christian. They seem so good at church but I feel like I am never going to be good enough. But the thing is, you dont have to be good enough to be accepted with God. But I feel like I have to be good!

Okayy, and yes there is a guy. (: Cody. I am in love with them, okay maybe not love. I mean for he has a girlfriend lol. But I have liked him since I was in 8th grade. And I got to see him a lot today. I seen him at lunch. And he just makes me go awwwww. I love you Cody. I met him from church and we had a church thing tonight. He sat by me. ♥ He is such a flirt that he makes me think that he likes me as much as I like him, and that is so not the case. he is in love with this stupid molly chick *gag*
well cody was like playing that stupid nervous game with me and rubbing my thigh and going towards my mhm. and then he was tickling me. and that just made me laugh like crazy, which made him laugh like crazy. Like he would tickle my knee caps and then he tried under my knees, and then he would rub my thigh and go up and it was insane. Like why do you do this to me lol. And on top of this I had a rip in my pants and he could have easily went up there and... yeah. And I love how the pastor was sitting right next to me. This was under the table at Main Street so its all cool. Lets see, I get all blushy and gooey when I am with him, but the thing is I dont get shy. I always want to be with him. I try the jealous game. ugh. And we have been friends since 8th grade. And he is in 8th grade right now, lovely, I am a pedifile and a flirt! But I got over that a long time ago.

I really just want him to be mine. I want to lay beside him and just rest my head on his chest. While playing with his fingers, and him playing with my hair. I want us to just talk for hours and just be together. ♥ So I have to pacient and wait for all of this to happen. Come on boy! (: I love you Cody!