been a while..

11/01/2012

so everything is still ticking over, home life is alright. Im pretty lonely still. all my friends bar one have boy/girlfriends and/or families so it kinda feels like I missed the boat. bad times. I ended up having a big panic attack triggered by a domestic violence storyline on hollyoaks of all things, it went on for about 45 mins and i ended up sleeping on the sofa, though it was a terrible night's sleep and i was still shaking this morning. bec said she saw me taking my duvet downstairs and wondered if I'd pissed the bed - LOL! feeling a bit better today but Im getting really wary of stuff like that now, even hearing someone shouting can start me off and takes me straight back to bad memories.

BMF classes are still going well, Ive lost 19lbs so far and hoping to lose 2lb this week to get my stone and a half annoyingly hardly anyone has noticed Ive lost weight, sounds shallow but it's the comments which really inspire you to keep going! Anyway inside classes start next week, even though theyre in a horrible place (talybont sports hall on western avenue) on friday evening at 6:30 rush houuuurrrrr! but it's been bloody freezing, muddy as hell and worst of all,, pitch black outside so the inside classes will be nice