Scatter Brained, First Entry

I’m here for an odd reason, ok not really odd, just frustrating. I’m married to a man that I love more than words and yet my ex haunts me. I don’t want anyone to know all the details in my real life so I’ll be using different names and as it is, I’m a twi-hard, so I’m “Bella”, my husband is “Jake” and my ex is “Edward”… This is my journey to trying to uncover some of my emotional issues. Jake and I have three small children together, they are my absolute life. But this starts way before our children, way before Jake and I ever met…

I was 16yrs old when I met Edward, I had just moved to where I live now, hundreds of miles from where I grew up. I was mending a broken heart when we met… And like in the Twilight story, I was drawn to him. Except our love wasn’t as epic… He was abusive through high school and yet I would always go back. Then after I dropped out and he graduated, things changed. I’m getting a little a head of myself but I don’t really know how to start this out without confusing everyone reading…

I live in a small town… the only place to really shop is at Wal-Mart, Edward’s children go to school with my children so we see each other a lot sometimes, not usually so much through the summer. I’ve met his wife, we go to Parent/Teacher meetings.. I’m polite to her but I can’t stand her. She’s a great person I’m sure but she’s with him… I simply don’t like her.

I’m good friends with Edwards mom, hell we are friends on face book, hang out when we can work it in {hardly ever, sadly}.

I’ve forgiven him for the past, him being a jerk to me… but I can’t forget about him. I guess this is all for now… I’ll try to write more tomorrow…