Time: 8:56am
State of Being: shock, panic, fear... can't figure out if I'm relieved yet. really hungry, yet nauseous. tired
Song lyric in my head: should i stay or should i go now
current desire: a new job
where am I?: in the bedroom on the bed
what's that noise?: watching Switched at Birth
I didn't sleep at all last night.
I quit my job today.
panic ensuing. Russ assures me we'll be okay. We'll be tight for a while, but okay. I called my mom, and she understood. Her brain works the same way as mine. Or mine works the same way as hers. She deals with mental issues too.
omg i quit my job. I haven't been unemployed in about 9 years, and that was for only a couple months while the hiring process was beginning for a new job after I moved back from Georgia to Florida. So in reality, it's been about 13 years since I've been unemployed.
omg.
it sucks, because i'm not a quitter. I HATE quitting. I feel like I failed at this.
Funny, because the one lady I thought I despised seemed so understanding and supportive. I kept telling her that I wasn't a bad teacher, and she was like "I never thought you were a bad teacher. This grade just isn't for you." She said if I ever needed a recommendation, she'll give it to me.
I told her I was quitting because of health issues. I didn't get into detail, and she didn't ask much. It is the truth. My health isn't good right now. I'm not myself. This crazy depressed person isn't me. I mean yes. I have bouts, but I can usually overcome them. This is different.
So I got all my stuff, gave her my keys, and Russ picked me up.
And I'm never going back. I'm freaking out. Because I love those kids. *sigh*
on another note, I have a job interview tomorrow. It's a part time English teacher for high school. Three hours a day 12-3. $30/hr. Another little private school. This one seems so cool and creative. Wish me luck.
peace!
-mel-
9:19am
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