Well, to start, I just got married Jan. 9th. I have an absolutely fantastic marriage. My problem is I have a meddling, manipulative, crazy, obsessed with her son, lying mother in law who has moved in with us. We just bought a house a week before Thanksgiving and the plan was, when she couldn't live alone anymore, she would move in. Well, Dec. 1st, we get a phone call that she lined up movers and gave her apt complex notice that she was moving out Dec 6th!!! She moved in. Then, it was she was retiring May 1st, well, she quit her job Jan. 2nd! She has refused to help with any bills or utilities, food, cable and internet bill, personal items (yes, she raids my bathroom while I am at work for my feminine items) and we even gave her the first floor bedroom, the first floor bathroom and turned our formal dining room into her own personal living room. We have a master suite upstairs of our own and she climbs the stairs to get my feminine items. She also refuses to replace food that she eats. I have personal food I purchase just for my lunches at work (I am a nurse and work long hours and don't always feel like cooking) and I drink only diet soda. She will eat/drink it before I even get any, then refuses to replace it. She then gets mad at me when I don't buy more or if I find I have 1 of something left, I will take it. Example: my husband splurged and bought me my frozen fruit bars and even bought her TWO boxes of her fave kind on Sunday at 7pm. When j got home from work at midnight, I went to get one of mine and ALL THREE boxes were empty!!! She said "I can't help myself, I eat things non stop" and yet, she wouldn't replace it or even save me one! Saturday, my husband and I disagreed with her on something regarding HIS daughter and she walked away calling us names and saying "F*** you" to us! Well, we made plans that night to go out to a nice dinner with just me, my husband and his daughter. He asks his mom to go because he felt sorry for her being mad at us and I was paying so, had to pay for her too. It cost me $60 for all of us and she was rude to me the whole way driving there, the whole time at dinner and the way back. She talked about me to the waitress!!! Then, Sunday, she is kissing my butt telling me how great I am and how lucky she is to have me as a daughter in law. I suck it up and smile at her for my husbands sake. I am MISERABLE! I don't want to come out of our room, I refuse to eat in my house now because there is usually none of my food left, I avoid walking g by her. I don't want this destroying my marriage and my husband said he won't let it destroy his marriage, but he has yet to say anything to her. I don't know what to do. Has anyone dealt with anything similar to this? If so, what did you do? By the way, she is only 62! Please help!!! I am desperate! |
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She needs to move out. Plain and simple! Your husband needs to lay down the rules or she needs to get out!!!
I would kick her out. If she can't appreciate anything, steals from you & lies, refuses to contribute to the bills or ANYTHING, then she shouldn't be living with you, in my opinion. I think you & your husband need a serious talk. He may say that he won't let this destroy your marriage, but it's inevitable if nothing is done about the mother-in-law. I hope everything works out. Good luck.
She needs to get out!! All she wants to do is cause trouble anyhoow. You're recently married too for gracious sake!!!!
Wow that is all I can say just wow. I am thinking she was still able to live alone but choose to live OFF of you instead. OUCH
Oh wow! I don't know how you can put up with that. I would do what I could to get her out of there. I get that she is your mother in law and she believes she needs to rely on you guys but you're not her caretakers. She's 62 which is young enough to be able to live on your own and support yourself. Especially if she was working. If she does stay with you guys then you'll need to put your foot down and say no more! She can't dictate your life, how much money you spend, or make you feel uncomfortable in the home that you own! If she wants to stay then she should pay rent and respect your rules.