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This was a triumph
by Chris

previous entry: NoJoMo #27-2 - Sexual Innuendo

next entry: Physical Affection

NoJoMo #29 - Power Dynamics

11/29/2020

So I want to warn you now that this subject is probably going to get really deep, and involves sexual abuse. If this is a sensitive topic for you, I suggest skipping this entry.

So every time the subject of the "age of consent" comes up on the internet, and I find myself engaged in a discussion about whether it should be legal for two teenagers to have sex with each other, I find it really "interesting" that the only example that ever gets brought up are two teenagers who are exactly the same age, engaging in consensual sexual activity with each other. But what nobody really thinks about is how small the age gap needs to be as a kid when power dynamics come into play. How there's really not much of a difference between a 31 and a 34 year old, but in the eyes of a child, there's a major difference between a 3rd grader and a 6th grader.

What people fail to understand here is that, that scenario is far more common than the two 15 year olds "in love" who want to have consensual sex and explore themselves and their sexualities. What typically happens is a 3rd grader who thinks they're the coolest kid in class because they're friends with the 6th grader who's on the cusp of puberty and will do anything to get someone to do the weird with them, elementary schooler or not.

These are the kinds of things people need to be thinking about if you want to engage in the discussion of age of consent, and the legality of underage sex. Because most people don't, and it's usually the loudest people with the strongest opinions who end up being the most ignorant one.

previous entry: NoJoMo #27-2 - Sexual Innuendo

next entry: Physical Affection

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I remember overhearing a conversation between my mom and an aunt, back when I was 14. They were discussing the age difference between me and my “boyfriend” who was 18. My mom said it was right on that line where she wasn’t sure she was entirely comfortable, as 18 makes him technically an adult, even if mentally and emotionally he wasn’t, not really. But that it sounds much better than 13 and 17. And she mentioned how nobody would bat an eye if we were both adults, as that age gap is nothing, then. Those words have always stuck with me, they are very relevant.

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