E. Quill's Diary
by E. Quill

previous entry: Could be the changing of the seasons but I don't love you anymore.

Dudley and the day with No Worriez


Went down for the 4th with my friend Aerith and her male friend. Why can i not recall his name already? Erka well lets call him Dudley. 

When I found out he had an SUV I was like "oh well thats cool maybe we can drive down to the beach with it. We can discuss it more when we get down there and decide what we want to do."

Then suddenly he didn't want to bring his vehicle..perhaps because he heard i might try to "force" him to take it down to the beach.  But our car was cramped so at the last minute he decided to take his. He was a pudgey nerdy type. Which is fine. So am I. 

At one point on the way to the mid point gas station (Washington side) J started to speed because he has a teeny tiny insignifigant bladder that can only handle a thimble full of urine. Exclusively on car trips. I have no idea what it is about car trips that makes his bladder shrink. After that stop I noticed them trailing behind. I mentioned it was probably in protest and he should mention that he doesn't usuually speed (because his crazy wife panics) because I felt like this slowness was a protest. Later he said it was in fact a protest because he doesn't speed like J. 

We stopped at my grandmothers to drop off the dog. It was brief. 

Then down to the beach. We went towards the oregon side once we hit N. I know it is one mile longer but the roads are straight and that moment when you sweep out and there is the bridge over the glittering water. Thats when I feel like I am home.  We made it up to my mothers and they had a tent set up for us. We set up our sleeping quarters and went to the Roo for dinner. 

We all got burgers except for Dudley. Who talked on and on about how he is meat and potatos blah blah blah. He got a giant steak.

We hung out int he yard at my mothers talking to 2 am. I bitched about Disco a lot. He also runs a guild. A role playing guild, on the dirty gross alliance side. We talked about the private lives of many of our raiders and he tried to tell us we had drama. I don't really feel that way as no one but those of us there know about Disco and her affair.  He mentioned he had people stealing from his guild bank. And that it was a crazy girl having a break down but that he knew previously about her, but not his officers about her upcoming breakdown. He also said he has allowed other guilds to merge with him with a "You can be an officer but its my guild so its all my way." 

We do everything on commitee.  and I would never put someone I didn't know into a position of power. Thats how mutinys start sir.  I'm sure they are both fine ways. And sometimes I get outvoted, and no I don't like it, but maybe sometimes I am not right and need the commitee to put things on the right path.

The next morning we woke up late. Dudley asked my mother for bread and butter to make toast. He made 6 pieces. Which is fine. It seemd liek a lot to me. 

For lunch we wanted to go to Serious Pizza. Its my favorite pizza in the whole world. They were up at the light house campgrounds. Then moved to the little store out there and finally moved down next to the I. Market. He was reluctant to get pizza. He kept making agonized eyes about it. Then informed us he couldnt handle the meat.  ude I saw you wolf down a steak.  So we went and J and I got a large pizza and devoured it. Like gross gluttonous pigs. I don't care. Its so good and I dont know when I will get it again. They had the doors open and a bug kept wandering in. J removed it twice and Dudley tried to make..jokes? About how the place was unsanitary and he wasn't going to pay or something. It was like a jokey bad yelp review. But he was so loud I was embarassed. 

The people remembered me from when they just had a teeny food stand. "You got the same thing." They told me. Its this nice older man and his adorable probably mail order bride. I love everything about them. They bought the Fort C store one day when the man went in early in the morning and a stranger asked the girl to break change on a 20 so he could use the showers at the camp ground. She told him she couldnt do that and hed have to go into town and how does he expect her to have change that early in the day. When he left she rolled her eyes and told the man, can you believe some people?"

He told her . "No I can't if you were my employee I'd have fired you for treating a customer like that." Then he bought it. And did.  I adore him.

We then went to Astoria. Which Dudley kept pronouncing in a weird fraudulent New York accent. Yep. I know about the hotel. Yep you are driving me nuts. We went all the way to Freddies because we forgot a few things. I got j some free sunblock when he found a 2 dollar off coupon. And I left the stand it was on and found the single use travel size sunblock for 1.99. I almost never use coupons. I felt like one of those people on that tv show. We forgot to use it and everyone would end up a little pink the next day.

We then went to the Astoria Column. We even went up. I used to go up there with P and whoever else but I dont think I have went up in years. Also I was in heels because I do not own any flats besides my horrible work shoes. I figured out years ago that if I own flats I might be tempted to take the lazy way out and use them. I may be an enormous cow, but fuck, I'm still a lady. So I only have heels. (Which I also wore to the beach the next day!)

I thought my legs would fall the fuck off. I had jelly knees about half way up. But I had people watching so I just kept going. Half way up. Aerith lost her shoe. So Dudley went to go and get it. Oh wait. No I mean my husband went down 80 teeny circular steps to get it at the very bottom and bring it back up. We got to the top and I don't consider myself afraid of heights in general but I didn't feel the confidence to scamper around up there as I would have years ago. I was holding onto the rail every step. 

We went down and I sat on the ground near a bench. I wanted to be more in tune with the earth for some strange reason.

A small child walked up and gave us all high fives. He was probably a little less than 2 years old. I felt like I earned that high five. 

Dudley explained that Astor died on the titanic. Blah Blah. He liked to explain.

J took Aerith to an A-town pot shop. It was her first time buyign and the guy gave her a bunch of free stuff. I stayed in the car with Dudley because we are both fat and that tower took a lot out of us.

We  then went home and hung out at the house at which point Aerith who had smoked some pot with us maybe..over did it. I am a habitual smoker. I never drink but I smoke some pot every single day. Dudley who doesn't smoke or drink was right up in her lap to overly comfort her. I really didn't think even for a rare smoker that it was a lot so I suspect some...playing it up for some boy attention. The relationship was new. I get it. You have to test our the caring for others boundaries. 

We totally left them at my mothers to check in with Fred. I know Aerith thinks he is a bit wild and maybe he is but since Dudley was sure as fuck not going to use his suv we needed to either figure out a way to get a fire down to the beach, or resign ourselves to something else. 

We hung out with him for a bit and got him to agree to bring his truck. He may have to leave early. So I told J very clearly and probably condescendingly that we needed to make it clear to F that we needed a place high up the beach since high tide was at 10:30 and somewhere near enough to walk into town. Sometimes F gets ideas and I get steam rolled. Also I can be kind of a control freak. Especially when I have reasons for doing things and I feel like F is more of a charge into things kind of person. So I passed the communication to J. We went down to the beach the 3 of us to scope it out for the next day and smoke a bowl. Then we went back to my moms where my aunt and her kids had shown up. This woman was married to my ex step dads brother. She also got divorced. But she and my mom have stayed friends from when they were sister in laws. I remember not liking her. Her home always felt like the malcolm in the middle house. She was a yeller and they would all sit down as a family and watch wrestling. There was always a lot of cursing and it felt like violence at their house. Even if it was just little boy and girl play wrestling violence. I was a read books and do art projects and play quietly with my dolls and act out stories kind of kid. 

She is now...covered in tattoos. And her fb is all pro marijuana as medicine posts. Maybe we would slightly get along. But she is a little to crunchy hippie for me. And I still feel aprehensive about her. I did not like her as a child.  I will say she was nothing but pleasent. 

Aerith and Dudley stayed in the tent.

The next day J went to get donuts. He came into the tent and jumped on my air mattress. I dont remember much but I think I shoved him pretty hard. I feel like sleep me wanted to push him through the tent. He told us he had donuts. 

After he left I heard Dudley say "I personally will be having buttered toast" I thought to myself, I hope my mother has another loaf of bread.

I know I sound hard on this guy. At one point Aerith said "Oh I want ____ " I don't know what it was, a nick knack in Marshas? A fancy computer? It doesn't matter She did not ask this guy for anything. It was just chatter. He responded with "Well when you finish college and start earning 70 k a year you can buy one for yourself."  She didn't ask you to buy it you peice of shit. What an awful date.

Then we went down to the beach.

We ended up like..RIGHT by the approach. Fred found the absolute perfect spot. We had a sshovel and the boys started digging. I mean. F and J. Aerith did too. I got a board and was scooping loose sand out of our area so we could have a wind block . We dug it down for we could all fit in it and have the fire on one side. It was windy at first. 

I told J and Aerith to go get burgers and told him he could get her a drink while he was out because before she invited this Dudley character she talked about how she wanted to just get absolutely wasted. So I said it made sense for the youngest skinniest people to go get the food.  At the last second Dudley tagged along. She did not get her drink and J said yes in fact he did slow them down. 

Also that they walked 3 across and even though she complained twice about being out in the road that Dudley had her on the outside. Finally J stopped him and said "ude go stand on the outside liek a gentleman" 

We ate in the back of the truck. And the day time dragged on. I kept checking the time talking about when the sun would go down. It was smaller this year because it was on a week day, but still grand and lovely. 

Aerith was cold though and sat covered in a blanket most of the day and I was worried she wasnt enjoying it. Finally when the fireworks started she climbed out of the blanket and enjoyed herself. At one point..she flirted with F. They both picked up pieces of wood and started sword fighting in the pit. I told J to make him stop, "Tickle him if you have to." At which point Aerith did that....and sat on him..and tickled him.

After that Dudley started saying things like "Ahh Kerrie, just think after 16 years this is how far we've come." Staking his claim. 

We saw a giant pit so big it was like a swimming pool. I asked the strangers if I could photo it. They said yes. another woman stopped to do the same. "id you not want to be in the picture?" She asked them. "No I want to, it's MY pit." J laughed and was like "Yea are you trying to take credit for his pit? You better tag him!"  Later we went by...and they had the tiniest lamest fire  in their pit. What a waste.

At one point a kid of about 14 or 15 walked up to j and said to him "No offence but our pit is way bigger" And J looked at him and laughed and said "Fuck off." To. a. child.

Later when the kid went by J started taunting him with "Our pit is the best  pit on the beach!" Ahh. Maturity.

But I forgot to mention that shortly after we arrived a dude in socks and sandles came by. "Are you going to be here?" 

"Um yea" said J and F as one. 

"Ok well we're going to be over here." and roped off a huge chunk of beach. For a concert. A reggae concert. We made bets about if they would all be white. We were correct. He asked if the people from the concert could come use our fire. I said "This is a family fire." Sorry buddy.

He sat there alone with a tiny cooler in his roped off section for awhile til the cops came and told him for what I gather was the second time that he may not rope off a public area and people need to feel that can walk anywhere on public space.

Then there was a fire. Way in town. People ran up the dunes to see it. He called out to them. "Hey man gonna have a show here at 8. 4 bands"  Over and over. Like...Hey after your tradgedy hows about some shitty music?
then they came and set up. Deafening loud 8 speakers. Playing eminem. Family friendly you know? I was furious. I sent my gaurd husband to go yell at them. They turned it down a bit. Then I looked up the laws about beach noise. And when I found you may not set up speakers and amplifiers past the distance of your own vehicle and area of use...I called the state patrol. 

It took hours but they did show up. And I was smug as fuck.

The band was awful. They started at maybe 8:40. they talked about how they play from their barn at home. Their name was "No Worriez" And I could not get my group to stop heckling them. I tried. I TRIED! But they booed. and told them to stop. At one point they played Brown Eyed girl. Aerith was angry that they butchered a song she liked. When they started playing their own original song 

"You are my baby
You are my baby
You are my baby
you are my baby
You are my baby
You are my baby
You are my baby
You are my baby
You're my honey bee
I really wanna buzz around your tree." 

I just longed for them to play brown eyed girl again. I swear those are the lyrics. I am a good listener.

They didn't get 4 bands. I don't think they had 2 really. Maybe they were all  from different bands and so were counting it as 4.  

I saw one old man come up and LOVE them. When they finished and my group was booing. He screamed "YEAAA" and walked away. Then came back with his wife to listen to this excellent band he found.  We assumed they had it there so they could look out and take photos "Look man thousands of peopel came to our show"

I tried to get everyone to leave them alone "Come on guys I feel like a dick being mean about their shitty garage band."

"on't."Said Aerith "Besides they're a barn band. Did you not hear him?"

They were the worst guys. Then at the end. They had no other bands..so they just started over.

After the band quieted down (Because I told on you you shitty barn band.)And it got dark it was all lovely. I hope they had a good time. I'd like Aerith to come back.  they held each other and watched the fireworks. Then Dudley was like "yea  i should have brought my suv here and we could have had 2 blocks for wind. I rolled my eyes. 

The next day Dudley and Aerith thanks my mom. "I usually don't like stuff like this but this was alrite." He said

"I'm glad you didn't hate it." My mom replied.

we left and were told we would meet Dudley at his house and then take Aerith the extra 20 minutes home. Because dude is a loser and I dont know. Ugh

Aerith talked to J and told him that now that guy was her bf. Because of course he is. It is so disopointing. Shes way to cool for him. And I hate him He is like a carbon copy of the last guy she dumped for being clingy and pathetic Ugh.

But maybe he is her honey bee. Has to buzz around her tree.


previous entry: Could be the changing of the seasons but I don't love you anymore.

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What a lovely trip! I'm glad you got your pizza. Your descriptions almost make me homesick for that place i will never want to call home again. I hope now that your friend is dating this guy she invests in some bread companies because holy shit 6 pieces of toast is extreme. That's like 3 sandwiches bud. [M kansas.campfire] [reply]